


Triangulation

by ChancellorGriffin



Series: OT3: A.R.K. (Abby/Raven/Kane) [1]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Bisexual Female Character, Bisexuality, Explicit Sexual Content, F/F, F/M, Multi, Oral Sex, Polyamorous Character, Polyamory, Sex, Sexual Content, Threesome, Threesome - F/F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-23
Updated: 2016-01-08
Packaged: 2018-04-05 12:29:14
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 9
Words: 36,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4179912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChancellorGriffin/pseuds/ChancellorGriffin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Abby has been seeing Marcus for awhile.  Then she sleeps with Raven when they’re stuck inside Mount Weather, and things get . . . well, complicated.</p><p>Doctor Mechanic/Kabby/OT3 fic, heavy on the smut and adorkable awkwardness. </p><p>P.S. This work is a sequel to "I Sing the Body Electric" (link here - http://archiveofourown.org/works/4007905), so if you have not read that one yet (no Kane, pure Doctor Mechanic), that will give you all the setup.  I did not intend to write a sequel and then I started having intense Kabby/Doctor Mechanic crossover feels and well, this happened.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Abby and Raven

**Author's Note:**

> Underage warning refers to brief mention of teenage Abby's relationship with Callie Cartwig in chapter 1. No underage content in the rest of the fic.

It wasn’t exactly that she hadn’t _meant_ to sleep with Raven.

She had definitely thought about it. A lot, actually. Like more than she maybe should have. That first night inside Mount Weather, after she had carried Raven in her arms down to the empty guest quarters to find them a bed, she had gently stripped the younger woman down to her camisole and underwear before putting her to bed. And even though the part of her brain labeled “DOCTOR” was firmly switched on, even though her hands on Raven’s body were only responding as though Raven were a patient, the second Raven was lying in that bed, sleeping soundly, hair dark against the white pillow, tanned skin glowing in the low light, that switch flipped off, and all Abby wanted to do was press her mouth up and down Raven’s taut, golden stomach and taste the salt of her skin.

But she didn’t.

She behaved herself.

She gritted her teeth, tucked Raven in, and took a blanket and pillow out to the rickety old sofa in the other room instead.

Did she, perhaps, after the lights were off, when she was all alone on the couch, slip her hand inside the thin, damp cotton of her underwear, to the place that the sight of Raven’s nearly-naked body had already stirred to wetness, and stroke herself to a sweaty, panting, nearly frantic orgasm at the thought of the girl in the bed on the other side of that door?

Well. Possibly. But the important thing, she told herself firmly, sinking into the rough corduroy cushions and falling into a heavy, sated sleep, is that she didn’t _do_ anything.

She was not going to do anything.

She couldn’t.

Not with Raven. Not with one of the only friends she had left.

She could not go through this again. Not after what she did to Callie.

***

Abby hadn’t been with a woman in years. Things with Callie had been so sweet and simple when they were younger; neither one of them made demands on the other, neither one felt the need to label it or force it into a box. They had been best friends all their lives, and then one night, during one of their dozens of teenage sleepovers, Callie rolled over in bed and kissed Abby, soft and warm and sweet, and a great echoing _yes_ opened up inside Abby, a realization, a piece of herself clicking into place as her mouth opened and she kissed Callie back. It was just kissing, at first. Soft whispers and giggles under the covers, lips touching lightly, slim young arms wrapped around each other. Infinite kisses. Then somehow, Abby didn’t remember how or when or who started it, hands got involved, and oh, the difference it made. They could hardly keep away from each other then. “You and the Cartwig girl are spending an awful lot of time together lately,” observed her mother absently one morning, and seventeen-year-old Abby felt her entire body flush bright red. She was terrified that it was written all over her, but nobody noticed. So it was kissing under the covers, and timid exploratory fingers that grew steadily bolder, and then one day Callie showed up in her bedroom with an entirely different idea about things she could do with her mouth besides kissing, and Abby finally learned what an orgasm was.

If you had asked Abby in the years between fifteen, when Callie first kissed her mouth, and nineteen, when Callie first kissed her somewhere else entirely, whether they were in a relationship, she would have stared at you blankly. Abby did not do relationships. Relationships were for people who wanted to get married and have a baby and live together and do everything together and become half a whole single unit. Abby wanted to finish medical school and become a doctor and maybe one day become a Councilor and spend a couple nights a week in bed with Callie. That was as much of a plan as there was.

Then Jake Griffin showed up.

Jake was different from Callie in every measurable way. Where Callie was earnest and serious, Jake was relaxed and light. Jake made her laugh. Thelonious introduced them at a party, and there was an easygoing cockiness to Jake Griffin that she warmed to immediately. Abby knew she had a tendency to take things too seriously, and Lord knows the rest of her social circle – Thelonious, Callie, Callie’s friend Marcus – did as well. Jake wasn’t like any of them.

After that first party, she found herself running into Jake Griffin all over the Ark, in unexpected places. And one day, after they had run into each other by accident too many times in the same week for any of them to really be accidental, he interrupted her in the middle of a story about an emergency appendectomy to push her up behind a bulkhead and kiss her, and he was so hard and hot and _male_ and it was so _different_ , her whole body felt the same thrill of ecstasy she got from Callie but somehow in an entirely new way, a way she wanted to explore. And so a few weeks later, she found herself in Jake Griffin’s bed, and a second brand-new world opened up before her as he did things to her that Callie had never done. Callie’s soft mouth. Jake’s hard cock. She wanted them both, needed them both. She did not know how to navigate this, and of course there was no one she could ask.

She began with Callie.

It did not go well.

There were tears, kisses, more tears. Callie was jealous and confused, Abby helplessly apologetic but also unsure quite why she was apologizing because she had not, as far as she understood it, violated anything. She had not realized that all the time she was planning her own future, Callie had been planning one that involved them both.

Abby had not meant to break her best friend’s heart.

(Nobody ever _means_ to.)

But it happens anyway.

So that had been the end of twenty years of friendship. It turned out that Abby never had to tell Jake about Callie – she wonders, now, sometimes, why she never did tell Jake about Callie – because Callie ended things right there and didn’t speak to Abby again for nearly fifteen years. Abby married Jake, became a doctor and had a baby, and it wasn’t until Clarke was twelve years old, when Abby was first elected to the Council alongside Marcus Kane, that she found herself suddenly thrown back together with Callie again. Marcus and Callie had a complicated, on-and-off relationship Abby did not fully understand, but working alongside him brought Callie back into her orbit, and she was relieved that the passage of time had soften the harrowing emotional agony of the way things had ended and left them with nothing but the affection of longtime friends.

Marcus Kane _did_ know about Abby and Callie – though whether by observation or from Callie’s own lips, she never did find out. Periodically, when he particularly wanted to get a rise out of her in council meetings, he would find some oblique way to reference it in order to throw her off balance. It nearly always worked. Even as a married woman in her forties with a teenage daughter, Abby remained oddly vulnerable in the face of her memories of Callie – the way friendship had turned to giddy delight, and then urgent desire, and then something that probably ought to be called love, and then to heartbreak and resentment, and then to half a lifetime’s worth of silence. Abby was grateful to have Callie back in her life, but treated her delicately, afraid to accidentally hurt her again.

And then, of course, it all went to hell.

Abby very carefully did not ever allow herself to think about Callie getting floated (so soon after Jake had been, too). She was allowed to grieve for Jake. She was his widow. No one would fault her for that. But her grief for Callie was more private, somehow. She wondered from time to time whether it was the kind of thing she might be able to talk about with Marcus – not the old, stern, chilly-eyed Marcus from the Ark, but the warm, protective, battle-scarred man he had become on the ground.

The man she had grown, unaccountably, to depend on and care for.

The man who was currently (at intermittent intervals) sharing her bed.

Yet another of the many, many reasons why, no matter how long they were locked up here alone inside the mountain, she was _absolutely not going to do anything_ with Raven Reyes.

She wasn’t.

***

The second day was a bit easier. She found it a simpler task to keep the “DOCTOR” switch flipped in the correct position while spending the day caring for Raven as a patient. Raven had been experiencing severe attacks of PTSD since the Battle of Mount Weather, and her resistance to admitting there was anything wrong had finally splintered and fallen apart. Which was good. That meant she might be ready for some help. So Abby dived in headfirst, spending the day patiently taking notes and sitting beside Raven in the control room (whose blackout the night before had sent her into a tailspin) in order to reassure her that the room contained nothing to fear. She also spent a fair amount of time familiarizing herself with Mount Weather’s luxurious kitchens, telling herself that all this effort was in aid of getting her patient to eat, to keep her strength up.

That was definitely it.

Not because of the sheer, seductive, domestic pleasures of playing house with Raven Reyes. Not because of the downright evil thoughts Abby had to force out of her mind when she watched Raven eat a strawberry for the first time. Not because of how effortless it felt to share space with her, how comfortably they orbited around each other as though they had been married for years. Not because of how it felt to sit down across the dinner table from her with big glasses of rich red wine, as though they belonged there, and feel the lush, gentle warmth of intoxication spread through her body. It wasn’t a harsh, guttural high like Jasper’s illegal moonshine (yes, even the Chancellor knew what Jasper’s moonshine tasted like); it was languid, seductive, like a velvet caress through the bloodstream, and it made Abby want to do all kinds of things that _she absolutely was not going to do_ with Raven Reyes.

And then she found herself, that night, in the precarious position of having to explain why she was headed back out to the couch again instead of simply sharing the bed with Raven, as an entirely platonic friend and doctor who was old enough to be her mother obviously ought to be able to do. And since Abby could not very well say, “So I can close the door to your room and make myself come while thinking about you without you hearing me,” she was forced to give in. Forced to strip down to her underwear, to climb into bed beside Raven, gritting her teeth and tensing her entire body at the thought of somehow trying to fall asleep while Raven was so close that Abby could hear her breathing.

And then . . . it happened.

It was just a gentle touch. That was all. It was just Raven’s hand, slipping around Abby’s waist and pulling her close. It was just skin on skin. Innocent. It meant nothing.

Except that Raven’s breath on Abby’s neck was ragged and labored and Abby knew – knew all the way down to her bones – that if she rolled over right now and took Raven’s mouth in hers, that she could have anything she wanted.

But the hand pressed against Abby’s stomach was timid, shy, and uncertain. _Go slowly,_ Abby told herself. _She may never have done this before._ _Be gentle. Make sure she’s sure._ So she simply curled into Raven’s warm body, melting softly into her, and they both fell asleep.

The third day was . . . well. Complicated.

Raven had clearly woken in a panic at having revealed too much of herself, and spent the entire rest of the day in an increasingly transparent series of elaborate maneuvers to dodge Abby’s presence. She dropped by the control room a few times to bring Raven food, but spent the rest of the day exploring the bunker’s library and art gallery.

Marcus rang in from Camp Jaha on her comm while she was in the library.

“How’s it going in there?” he said, his voice clear as a bell thanks to Raven’s expert tinkering with the long-distance comm system they had pilfered from Mt. Weather three months ago.

“I’m playing house,” said Abby. “Raven is messing around with some electrical something and I’ve got nothing to do, so I’ve been in the kitchens off and on the past couple days, and now I’m in the library.”

“There’s a library?” asked Marcus, suddenly interested. “How did we not know there’s a library?”

“It’s on Level Five,” she said.

“Oh,” he said. “Right.” Level Five, which had become a mass grave when all the residents of Mount Weather who had gathered there for safety were slowly irradiated after Cage Wallace refused to let the 48 go free. The supply caravans largely avoided Level Five. “Is it – are you –“

“It’s fine,” she said, “the library is fine. I like it here, actually. I made tea and I’ve been reading all afternoon.”

“Well, I’m glad you’re enjoying your vacation,” he said dryly. “Wick will be there around ten tomorrow morning so have fun while it lasts. The second those doors open you’re the Chancellor again.”

“I quit,” she said. “I just want to stay here and read all day.”

“Not an option.”

“You’re no fun,” she said. “You used to be fun.”

“No, I didn’t,” he said, and she could hear him smiling through the comm. “I never used to be fun.”

“That’s true,” she said. “Oh! I forgot to tell you. I’m bringing you a present. I’m stealing a copy of _The Iliad_ for you. And a book of American poetry for me. We can trade when you’re done.”

“I’ve never read _The Iliad_.”

“When was the last time you read something just for enjoyment?”

“I honestly don’t remember,” he said. “I think I was ten.”

“You’ll like _The Iliad_ ,” she said. “It’s about you. Or, rather, it’s about a man named Hector, who you’ll like because he’s basically you.”

“What happens to him?”

“Well, he dies horribly –“

“Abby!”

“But everyone in the book does, so that doesn’t really mean anything, that’s not really the point. You’re going to like it, I promise.”

“No one’s ever given me a book before,” he said, and she could tell he was pleased, almost a little dazed by it, and she felt herself grow warm, soft, open, felt herself _wanting_ him.

“How’s it going with Raven?” he asked suddenly, snapping her back to reality.

“She’s getting better, I think,” said Abby. “She hasn’t had another attack since we’ve been inside.”

“That isn’t what I meant.”

“What did you mean?”

“I meant how is it going with _you_ and Raven?”

There was a silence.

“I’m alone, by the way,” said Marcus finally after a long tense moment. “Are you alone? I should have asked.”

“Yes,” she said. “She’s three floors up. I’m alone. What did you mean?”

“You know what I meant,” he said mildly. “I meant, has anything happened between you and Raven yet?”

Abby had no idea how to respond to this.

“I’ve known you for twenty years,” said Marcus. “I knew about you and Callie. I’ve seen the way you look at Raven. And you’ve been alone with her for two and a half days.” Silence. “Abby, this doesn’t have to be weird,” he said frankly. “You don’t have to feel weird about it.”

“Marcus –“

“Do you want to?”

“Yes,” she said finally in a small voice. “I want to.”

“Good,” he said with a laugh. “I’m glad we got that out of our systems.” Abby wasn’t sure why she was blushing with her entire body but she was relieved Marcus wasn’t there to see it. “Look,” he said. “There isn’t anybody else that I want to sleep with except for you.”

“Marcus –“

“No, hang on, let me finish. There isn’t anyone else, for me, but you. But that doesn’t mean that I would be upset if the reverse wasn’t true. We’re not married, Abby, and you’ve had multiple lovers before and that was something that made you happy, which means I always knew it was a possibility that it might happen again. And I know in the past I was awful to you about Callie, I used it against you in terrible ways, but it wasn’t because, I wasn’t _jealous,_ I just – I don’t know. I resented you. I wanted to be cruel. I hate myself for it now, obviously, but don’t let that –“ He stopped, collected himself. “Okay,” he said. “Look. This is what I’m trying to say. If, when you get back to camp, you think we should sit down and have a conversation with Raven, then let’s sit down and have a conversation with Raven.”

“I don’t want it to be like it was before,” she said softly. “With Jake and Callie. I don’t want to do that again. They couldn’t stand each other. It was ugly. Tense. Everything had to be secret. If I was going out with Jake, I couldn’t tell Callie or it would upset her. If I was spending the night with Callie, I would play it off with Jake like we were just friends. It was all just too hard. Too many lies.”

“No lies this time,” he promised. “No sneaking around. Honest and up front and in the light. We can be adults about this.”

“Promise?”

“Promise,” he said. “Just, you know, if you can help it, try not to sleep with her until after we’ve talked all this out, all right? It’s complicated, and she’s young.”

“Don’t remind me.”

“I’m not reproaching you,” he chuckled, “I’m just saying.”

“I’m not planning to sleep with her, Marcus,” she said, a little tartly, and he laughed again.

And later that night, with Raven’s sweaty warm body on top of hers, fingers deep inside Abby’s slick wetness, urging her on to a dizzying orgasm, she would wonder if he had known the entire time that this was how it was going to happen. It seemed as though, of the three of them, Kane was the only one who was not surprised.

So, you see, she hadn’t exactly _meant_ to sleep with Raven.

But she hadn’t meant _not_ to, either.


	2. Marcus and Abby

 

It was late in the evening by the time the supply caravan finally returned from Mount Weather. Marcus came out to the gates of Camp Jaha to meet them. From the fact that Raven was walking with her eyes lowered to the ground, flustered and awkward as though everyone was staring at her without her clothes on, and the fact that Abby’s first and only words to Marcus as she passed him were “Don’t start with me,” he knew exactly what had happened.

_Goddammit, Abby._

He heaved a bone-deep sigh of exasperation before following Sinclair and Wick to the storage sheds to help them unload supplies – watching, out of the corner of his eye, as Abby headed off to her quarters and Raven, attempting to be nonchalant and subtle about it but falling wide of the mark, followed her. It took him about half an hour to extricate himself from the storage inventory, leaving Sinclair in charge, and by the time he arrived at the Chancellor’s quarters it was clear that the conversation had not gone well.

 _“Three days,_ Abby,” Raven snapped as Marcus closed the door behind him. “We were in there for _three days._ Alone. Nobody else around. No distractions. Nothing to prevent you from mentioning at least once, before, you know, we _slept together_ , that you were already in a relationship with somebody else.”

“These walls aren’t soundproofed,” said Marcus tactfully, alerting them both to his presence. “People can hear you.”  

“Raven, I’m sorry,” said Abby in a low voice. She was sitting on the bed, her head in her hands, as Raven stormed up and down the room. Marcus leaned against the wall, staying out of the way, and watched them. Embarrassment and annoyance were to be expected, he thought, but there was something else going on here. Raven was _furious._ She was so angry she was actually shaking, and Abby appeared completely at a loss.

“And you were the one that _started_ it,” Raven went on bitterly.

“I know. I’m sorry. I know. I screwed up.”

“I would never have – I wasn’t going to –“ She shook her head, as if trying to brush off some dark, heavy emotion, and caught sight of Kane, standing in the doorway. “I didn’t know,” she said to him helplessly. I’m not that kind of – I didn’t know. I would _never_ – ”

“Raven,” he said gently. “You haven’t done anything wrong. It’s okay. I knew.”

“What do you mean, you _knew_?” she said suspiciously.

“I mean that I thought something might happen,” he said. “I talked to Abby, while you were both inside Mount Weather.”

“You talked to her?”

“Yes.”

“On the comms.”

“Yes.”

“On the long-distance comms _I built you,_ which are basically _public_ , you two discussed whether or not Abby and I were going to sleep together. Before _we_ discussed whether we were going to sleep together.”

“We never actually discussed it,” Abby pointed out, “it just sort of –“

“You’re not helping,” said Marcus repressively.

“So he knew already,” said Raven to Abby, throwing up her hands. “He knows we slept together? He knows and he’s just standing there with his arms folded like this is all super fucking normal and he’s super fucking cool with it? Even though you guys are, like, I don’t know, whatever the hell you guys are?”

“I’m not _cool with it_ ,” said Kane, with a stern look at a very sheepish Abby. “I had a whole plan. It involved the three of us sitting down and having an adult conversation, long before anything actually happened, to prevent exactly this scenario. To keep anyone from getting hurt.”

“Well, great work,” said Raven tartly. “A-pluses all around.”

“Raven,” said Abby soberly. “If you want to – should we pretend it never happened? If that’s what you want, I can do that. If you regret it. If you wish we hadn’t. If it’s all too complicated now. I can – I can try.”

Raven turned to her then sharply, and gave her a long appraising look. Marcus watched her considering it seriously. Then, finally, she shook her head.

“No,” she said. “I don’t want to do that. I don’t think I can do that. I can’t pretend it never happened. Everything’s different now.”

“I don’t want to either,” said Abby, standing and moving closer to Raven, taking both of Raven’s hands in her own. “I don’t want to let go of it. I know I screwed up, Raven, I got carried away, I should have told you, there’s no excuse for that, but I’m glad it happened, I wanted it to happen, it was – you were –“

“He’s standing _right here_ ,” exclaimed Raven in shock, gesturing to Kane. _“Jesus.”_ And she stormed out of the room. Kane called after her but she didn’t stop. “I need some air,” she said. “I can’t do this right now.” They listened in silence to the clomp of her angry footsteps on the metal floor of the Ark until she disappeared outside.

Abby looked at Kane.

Kane looked at Abby.

“That could have gone better,” was all he said, as Abby sank down into her desk chair, rubbing her temples wearily.

“I’m a terrible person,” she said.

“You’re not a terrible person.”

“She was so angry, Marcus,” she said heavily, looking up at him. “I mean a hundred times more angry than I ever would have thought she would be, and I don’t understand why.”

“I can tell you why,” he said. “But you’re not going to like it.” Abby looked up at him, a question in her eyes. “You forgot about Finn Collins,” said Marcus. “You forgot about the part where she arrived on the ground to find that her boyfriend was sleeping with your daughter. She’s angry because she thinks you put her in the position of accidentally being the Clarke to somebody else. She’s angry because it just reinforces the fact that the Griffin women will sleep with anyone without thinking through the consequences.”

“That’s a little harsh,” said Abby stiffly, turning away from him and staring down at the floor.

“I’m not saying it’s the truth,” he said. “I’m telling you that’s what she’s thinking right now. That’s why she was so devastated. She takes fidelity seriously because she knows how much it hurts when it goes wrong.”

Abby sighed. “You’re right,” she said. “I wasn’t thinking.”

“No, you weren’t,” he said. “Because you wanted her. We all make stupid decisions in moments like that. We’ve all done it.”

“Do we talk about this?” she said suddenly, looking up at him.

“What do you mean?”

“With each other. You and me.   Is this the kind of thing you want to know or the kind of thing you don’t want to know?”

Marcus went over to the bed and sat down on the edge of it, holding out his hand towards Abby. After a moment, she stood and walked over to him, took his hand, and sat down beside him. He pulled her close and she leaned her head against his shoulder.

“Why don’t you talk to me,” he suggested, “and if I need you to stop, I’ll tell you to stop.”

And so she did. She told him everything. She told him about the blackout and Raven’s panic attack at the door, about cooking her dinner and playing house in the guest quarters, about Raven’s shy caress on that night when they first shared a bed, and how the book of poetry had done something to her and pushed her past all bounds of appropriate behavior and made her forget everything Marcus had said when she called him from the library and how all she wanted to do from the moment Raven climbed into bed with her was to bury her mouth between Raven’s thighs and devour her until she came in Abby’s arms. Marcus listened until Abby had finished the entire story, and then he spoke.

“You have feelings for her,” he said, and it wasn’t a question. “Not just sex, I mean. Real feelings.” Abby nodded helplessly. “And you didn’t know that until now, but now everything is complicated.”

“I made a mess of it,” she said.

“Well, maybe a little,” he conceded, “but I think we can fix it.”

“I should talk to her.”

“No,” he said, “you should stay here. I should talk to her. I’m the one she thinks she accidentally betrayed. I’m the one that needs to reassure her that she hasn’t done anything wrong.” He looked at her then. “We’re good, right?” he said. “You and me. This doesn’t change anything with us.”

“No,” said Abby seriously. “This doesn’t change anything with us.” And she leaned in and kissed him, long and hard and fierce, and he kissed her back, and wrapped his arms around her, and their bodies melted together, and she was warm and soft and he had missed her and _goddammit_ if it weren’t for the fact that he couldn’t do this to Raven . . . But he pulled away, finally, kissing Abby on the forehead, promised to be back later that night, and set off to undo the damage that had already been done.

* * *

He found her alone, around the back of the camp at one of the perimeter campfires. Scatterings of people still milled about – it wasn’t terribly late yet – but everyone seemed to be giving Raven a wide berth. There was something repressive about the dark look in her eyes as she sat there, silent and stone-faced. It was a warm night, quiet, hardly a sound but the faint distant voices of people in the background and the pop and crackle of the flames.

Marcus approached from behind, so she didn’t even see him coming until he was seated on the ground right beside her. He pulled a flask of moonshine out of his pocket and handed it to her.

“Here,” he said. “We’re going to need this.”

She took it without looking at him, took a long swig and passed it back, and he took a drink too. They did that for awhile, drinking in silence and staring into the fire, before Raven finally spoke.

“I didn’t mean to hurt anybody,” she said faintly, so quiet he almost didn’t hear her.

“You didn’t, Raven,” he said. “I’m okay. Abby is okay. We want to know if _you’re_ okay. I know this is . . . complicated.”

“I don’t understand it,” she said, shaking her head. “You love her. Abby. You _must_ love her. It’s so obvious.”

“I do,” he said. “I do love her.”

“And she loves you.”

“Yes.”

“But she – when we were – she _said_ things, she _did_ things, I thought, it felt like, I thought maybe she – that there was something –“ She broke off, unable to finish, and Marcus passed her the flask again.

“You weren’t wrong,” he said. “She does. She does have feelings for you. You weren’t wrong about any of it. It doesn’t diminish what she and I have if she also feels a connection with you.”

 _“How?”_ she exclaimed. “How is that possible?”

He shrugged. “We’re different,” he said. “There isn’t anyone else for me but her. Not right now. I’m not sure I’m wired that way, I’m not sure there ever would be. But it would be perfectly fine with her if there ever was. But Abby is perfectly capable of loving two different people in two different ways without either one taking away from her feelings for the other.”

“Love?” said Raven in a timid voice, and Marcus passed the flask back to her with a smile.

“It’s not for me to say,” he said. “But she wouldn’t feel so terrible about hurting you if her feelings weren’t real. And she’s terrified because it all ended so badly the last time. With Jake and Callie. I think there’s a part of her that never recovered from that. From hurting someone she cared about so much.”

“Who’s Callie?” asked Raven curiously, turning to look at Marcus for the first time.

“She was Abby’s best friend on the Ark,” he said. “They grew up together. They were lovers when they were young, and when Abby started seeing Jake, things got tricky. They didn’t like each other, those two. There was a lot of jealousy there. And when Abby slept with Jake for the first time and told Callie about it, it broke Callie’s heart. It had never occurred to Abby that Callie thought it would be only the two of them forever. It had never occurred to Callie that there would be anyone else. It was a mess. Everyone got hurt. And so Callie ended it, and Abby ended up with Jake. Who was . . . less complicated.” He took a long swig and passed the flask back to her. “I’d like to be friends with you, Raven,” he said. “This will all be so much easier to navigate if you and I can be friends.”

She nodded.

“Yeah,” she said. “I guess we could try that.”

“Good,” he said. “Okay. Good.”

“So what do we do?” she asked. “I mean, what happens now? Do we – I mean, are we both in a relationship with Abby now?”

“I suppose so,” he said.

“So it’s kind of like we’re in a relationship with . . . each other?” She furrowed her brow a little at this, a displeased expression on her face.

“I don’t –“ He stopped short. “I don’t know how to say this without being rude, but . . .”

“We’re good, Kane,” said Raven with a crooked grin, “I don’t want to sleep with you either,” and Marcus let out a sigh of relief so monumental that it made Raven burst out laughing. He gave her a look, one bemused eyebrow raised, but after a moment he began to chuckle too.

“I was trying to find a balance between not making arrogant assumptions and not insulting you,” he said. “I’m not sure how well I did.”

“If you want this to work,” said Raven, “we’re going to need to do something about your people skills.”

He passed the flask back to her and watched as she took a long swig.

“Story of my life,” he said.

***

“How is she?” asked Abby as soon as Marcus closed the door behind him. She was already in bed, naked and waiting, and she watched him as he undressed and piled his clothes on the chair by her desk.

“She’ll be fine,” he said. “I think. I don’t know. It’s a lot to ask someone to process, all at once.”

“I don’t want to lose either of you,” she said softly. “But I don’t want to be selfish. I don’t want to make anyone do something they don’t want to do.”

He climbed into the bed beside her.

“We’re going to try to figure this out,” he said. “All three of us. This isn’t going to be like Jake and Callie. This isn’t going to end in disaster like before. Nobody’s heart is going to get broken here if I can help it. Okay?”

She nodded. “Okay,” she said.

He switched off the light and rolled over to face her. “And now,” he said, slipping a hand down between her thighs to find her already warm and wet and yielding, “you are home from Mount Weather and Raven’s turn is officially over. Now we’re on my time.”

“Oh?” she said, smiling at him, her breath quickening as he slid one finger inside her. “And how do you propose we use your time?”

“I have several ideas,” he said, as he added a second and then a third finger, causing her to gasp aloud and thrust up against him. “Let’s start here.”


	3. Raven and Abby

In the hopes of giving Abby and Raven some breathing room to have the conversation they should have had already but didn't, Marcus tactfully got himself assigned to the next Mount Weather supply run and was gone for four days.

It did not go quite how he had hoped.

For the first two days, Raven successfully managed to dodge ever being in Abby's presence for longer than about ten seconds, and was never surrounded by fewer than four other people.  There was absolutely no chance to talk.  Abby tried, a few times, to get her alone just for a few minutes; she sent Jackson to go find Raven to come fix an electrical panel (which wasn't actually broken), but Raven sent Wick, who looked at it for two seconds, said "the power cord is unplugged," and then turned around and left again.  Perfect.  Not only was there no chance to talk to Raven, now there were patronizing eye rolls as well.

Later that day, she tried wandering by the tent around the back of the camp that Raven used as a makeshift workshop; but Raven, as if anticipating this, had moved her tent closer to one of the central campfires, which meant there was always a cluster of people milling around, and no privacy. 

"Can we talk for a few minutes?" Abby had said, after standing there awkwardly for several minutes while Raven dismantled a radio and pointedly refused to look up at her.

"I'm super busy," she said.

"Okay," said Abby.  "It doesn't have to be now.  Is there a better -"

"No."

And that was how the first day went.

The second day was both harder and easier, since instead of being cold and distant, Raven was simply gone.  She had tagged along with Bellamy and Sinclair on a day trip to rendezvous with some friends of Lincoln; they were trading construction supplies raided from Mount Weather to the Grounders in exchange for assistance in setting up some basic agricultural systems, and Raven claimed she was needed in case any of the equipment they were trading was faulty.  And while nobody fell for it, they all assumed she was just stir-crazy from being cooped up at camp for so long and would have taken any excuse to get out and walk around.  Only Abby knew what - and who - Raven was really avoiding.

Bellamy's team didn't get back until late that night, and Abby had already gone to bed when she heard the sound of the gates opening to let them back in.  She sighed and stared up at the ceiling.

 _You fucked up, Abby,_ said the voice in her head.  _She's never going to speak to you again._

It was so clear to her, now, looking back at it, that Marcus had been right.  Raven would have been right to feel embarrassed, annoyed, misled by Abby's failure to mention anything about him.  But the cold fury with which she had stormed out of Abby's quarters could only have come from one place.

Abby hadn't just made a mistake; she had accidentally stepped on the emotional landmine inside Raven's heart labeled "CLARKE AND FINN," and she did not know how to fix it.

She was lying in her bed, tossing and turning and trying to switch off her brain so she could fall asleep when she heard a knock at the door.

When you're the Chancellor, and someone knocks on your door after midnight, it's never good. Abby leaped out of bed, heart racing, and bolted across the room to unlock the door and fling it open.

It wasn't a political crisis.

It was Raven.

They looked at each other for a long moment, neither one wanting to speak first.  Finally Abby stepped aside to let Raven in.  She entered without a word but didn't sit.  Instead, as Abby closed the door behind her, she paced back and forth across the middle of the room, thin arms wrapped around her torso - whether for protection, or from nervousness, Abby didn't know.

"I've been going over it and over it," she said finally, "and I can't figure it out.  I don't know what we are.  What I am to you.  I don't know what this is."

Abby crossed over from the door to sit on the edge of the bed, looking up at Raven, and waited patiently for her to go on.  She could see an avalanche of words building up inside Raven and judged it better not to jump in until the younger woman had said what she came to say.

"I don't know what this _is_ ," she said again, a little desperately.  "It didn't, when we were in the bunker, it didn't feel like, I didn't think - that you just wanted - that it was only -"

"No," said Abby, "it wasn't."

"It felt like you - that you might have - that it might be, maybe, something more like - but then we come back, and Kane's here, and he's all, you know, 'Oh, I _totally_ knew, don't even worry about it,' which is _so_ _fucking weird_ , Abby, I can't even tell you -"

"I know."

"We're not even _friends,_ I don't even _like_ him that much, I mean, I'm going to try, you know, because otherwise, this is gonna be a _disaster,_ but it's not like he and I go way back and we're best buddies or whatever, I hardly know him, and yet now we're like, what, supposed to take _turns_?  Is that how it's going to be?  Did he get himself assigned to the convoy to leave us alone on purpose?  So this is my time?  These are my four days?  And then he comes back and it's his turn again?"

"I don't know, Raven," said Abby gently.  "We're all figuring this out for the first time.  All of us."

“Who’s in charge of logistics?" Raven went on, her voice rising a little in hysteria.  "Is there a system?  There should be a system.  Who's in charge?  You?  Do you tally it up?  I didn't sleep with you last night or the night before, do those nights still count towards my weekly total?"

"Raven, it's not like that."

"And what if there's a night that it _is_ my turn but you're not in the mood for, you know, girl stuff?  Do we switch?  Do I need to file my paperwork in triplicate and get Kane's signature?"

"Raven -"

"How do we make sure it's fair?  Does it have to be exactly even?  These were my four days so he gets the next four?  Do I need a calendar?  I should get a calendar."

"Raven, slow down."

"I'm just trying to figure out what I've accidentally gotten myself into," she said. "I'm trying to figure out what the _hell_ I'm supposed to do next.  What do I do next?" she said, and she turned to Abby for the first time, looking at her, really looking at her.  "What do we do now?" she said, her voice almost pleading.  "How do we do this?"

Abby stood from the bed and went over to where Raven was standing and put her arms around her.  Raven tensed up at her touch and for a long moment, very nearly resisted.  But Abby's arms around her were soft and warm and comforting and full of something that, if it wasn't love, felt like it might be something at least pointed in that general direction, and she held Raven close with such fierce, protective affection that Raven softened and sunk deeply into her arms.  This was the Abby who had saved her inside Mount Weather.  The Abby who had taken that wrench from her hand and held her while she cried and cooked her dinner and slept beside her.  All of that was real.  It was all still there.

Abby held her for a long time, stroking Raven's hair, pressing kisses into the top of her head.

"I promise you," she said softly, "we will figure this out."

"How?" asked Raven, in a muffled voice, her face buried in Abby's shoulder.

"I don't know," said Abby.  "But we will."  She placed a hand on Raven's cheek and lifted Raven's face up to meet her own, brushing the hair out of Raven's face with infinite tenderness.  "Raven, I don't want to lose you.  You're too important to me."  She pressed a soft kiss on Raven's mouth.  "I can't lose you," she whispered.  "You and me, we're the only ones.  We're the only ones who understand.  I need you, Raven." 

"Abby, I don't know how to do this," she said in a fragile voice.  "I don't know how to do any of this.  I barely know how to do a _regular_ relationship.  There was only ever Finn, before.  I barely know how to do that.  And now this -"

"I know," said Abby, taking Raven's hand and leading her over towards the bed.  "I know."  She climbed in, and held out her hand to Raven, who hesitated for a moment before finally reaching down to unlace her boots and step out of her pants.  She pulled the shirt over her head, but left her shorts and camisole on, and walked carefully over to the bed, where she removed her leg brace and sat it down on the floor, then climbed in next to Abby and flopped back against the pillow with a deep sigh.

"Why did it have to be _Kane,"_ she said, exasperated, and Abby laughed in spite of herself. 

"Well, I'm sorry about that," she said.  "I didn't exactly plan for this scenario."

"It would be so much simpler with a guy _I_ wanted to sleep with too," said Raven.  "Can't you just date Wick or something?  Then we could all three just shack up in here every night, and do whatever, and there wouldn't be any scheduling or anyone feeling left out.  I mean, it would still be weird, don't get me wrong, but it would be easier."

“Yes," said Abby, slowly, "that would be easier," and Raven propped herself up on her elbow to stare at her.

_“Abby.”_

“I didn’t say anything,” protested Abby.

“Abby, I am _not_ sleeping with Kane.”

“Of course not.”

“I have absolutely no interest in having sex with Marcus Kane.”

“I know that.”

“And he has no interest in me.”

“I know that too.”

“So why do you have your Idea Face on right now?”

"What if we did everything you just said except you didn't have to do anything with Kane?"

"What are you -"

"No taking turns.  No one getting left out.  All three of us.  Here."

Raven stared at her for a minute while she tried to process what Abby was actually suggesting.  Her eyes widened.

“You realize me _watching you_ have sex with Kane is only like one step less weird than me actually doing it.”

"But a big step," Abby pointed out.

"This is an insane idea."

"I know."

An _insane idea_."

"If you have a better one -"

"Like, you're saying, I'd just, like, hang out here, and watch you two go at it, and then he would watch you and me?  Oh God," she said, realizing what she was saying.  " _He'd be watching you and me._ He'd be _right there_.  _Watching.  God,_ that sounds awkward."

"If you have another suggestion," said Abby, "I'll try anything.  I'm not kidding.  You think of something and I'll do it.  I'll do anything, Raven.  I don't want to lose Marcus, I don't want to lose you, I'm out of ideas."

Raven flopped back against the pillow.  Abby could see her thinking about it.

"I don't know," she said finally, "I think you came up with this plan because it means you're always going to be the one who gets to come twice in one night."  But there was just the tiniest hint of a laugh in her voice that made the tight knot in Abby's chest loosen ever so slightly.  She slipped a hand between Raven’s thighs, underneath the thin black cotton, and gently ran her fingertip over the hard bud of Raven’s clit, making her flinch and utter a sharp moan.

“You don’t think I can make you come twice in one night?”

“Abby,” Raven tried to protest, but whatever she was going to say next got all mixed up with the moans of pleasure that Abby’s hand brought forth, and finally she just stopped trying to talk at all. Abby stroked her gently, tenderly, pressing melting soft kisses against Raven’s skin.

“You are so lovely,” she murmured into Raven’s hair. “You are so clever and strong and brave. You are extraordinary, Raven Reyes. I don’t want to lose you.  I _can't_ lose you.”

And that was the end of Raven’s attempts at resistance. She surrendered entirely. And the last conscious thought that circled through her mind, before Abby stirred her to a climax so fierce that her brain just shut down altogether, was wondering how on earth she would ever be able to get naked in front of Marcus Kane.

Good Lord.

The things we do for love.


	4. Marcus and Raven

 

Marcus returned from the long trek home from Mount Weather just in time to wolf down some dinner and fall into bed, hoping to catch four or five hours' sleep before he had to get back up again for the midnight patrol shift he had forgotten he volunteered for.  He had just managed to doze off when he was roughly awakened by a loud, insistent pounding at his door.

“Hang on,” he said blearily, stumbling out of his bed and across the room as the knocking continued. “I’m coming,” he said irritably, “stop knocking, I’m coming.” And he opened the door to see Raven standing there, hand poised mid-knock.

“Good,” she said, sailing past him into the room, “you’re here.”

“I was _sleeping,_ Raven,” he said, rubbing his eyes.

“It’s only like nine o’clock,” said Raven in astonishment, “what are you, a hundred?”

“No, what I am is back on shift at midnight. Can this wait?”

“We have a situation,” she said, sitting down on the side of his bed.

“A situation.”

“Yes,” she said. “An Abby situation.”

Marcus rubbed his eyes. “Raven, I’m _barely_ awake, I don’t think –“

“She wants us to sleep together.” That got his attention. His head snapped up and he looked at her, startled and flustered. “No, sorry,” she corrected herself, with a little laugh, “I don’t mean she wants us to like – you and me. She wants us both to sleep with _her._ Like, at the same time. Like a . . .” And then she blushed, suddenly. “Like a threesome,” she mumbled under her breath, as though embarrassed to say the word in front of him.

“She wants to do this _now_?” asked Marcus, baffled.

“Well, no.”

“Good,” he said, yawning. “Then it can wait until tomorrow.”

She didn’t move from his bed.

“We should do some dry runs,” she said. He stared at her, uncomprehending.

“Dry runs?”

“Yeah,” she said. “You know, like drills. Like to prepare.”

“Drills?”

“We’re barely friends,” she pointed out in a practical voice. “We’re going to be _naked_ together. We’re going to be watching each other with Abby. It’s going to be _weird as hell._ We need to get the weird out of our systems.”

 _“Drills?”_ said Marcus, still trying to figure out what the hell she was talking about.

“Yeah,” she said. “We need practice.”

“Drills.”

“Stop saying that.”

“Raven, I’m _barely_ awake right now, and you’re sitting on my bed trying to schedule a _sex drill,_ I don’t even know what to –“

“Well, no, not a _sex drill,_ I’m not going to have _sex_ with you –“

“Wait, I'm confused, you said –“

“I’m going to have sex _near_ you, that’s _different,_ we’re not going to actually _do it_ –“

“I’m lost,” he said, shaking his head to try to clear the fog out of it, resigning himself with a sigh to the fact that he was unlikely to get any more real sleep tonight. “What exactly are we going to be, you know, practicing?”

“Well,” she said, “there’s going to be, you know, naked stuff –“

“Not with each other.”

“No, but _watching_ each other, which is, you know, _weird,_ and then like if we’re all going to be like piled in the same bed together there might be, I don’t know, _touching_ or something, you know, like _accidentally,_ and I don’t want to like freak out and ruin everything, which is why we need –“

“A sex drill.”

 _“A dry run,”_ she went on firmly, as though he hadn’t spoken. “We need practice. We need to get comfortable with each other.” Her tone was light, almost flippant – to hide her discomfort, he suspected – and he suddenly realized that she was very serious, and a little afraid. “This is important,” she insisted. “We need to figure out how to make this work.”

He sat down next to her on the bed, a respectful distance away.

“You realize,” he said, “that you absolutely do not have to do this.”

“What’s the alternative?” said Raven, turning and looking at him. “You get Mondays, I get Tuesdays? If I’m on a supply run during one of my scheduled evenings do I have to request a formal trade with you?”

“It’s not going to be like that.”

“Do you know that?” she pressed him. “Do you know that for sure?”

“Well,” he said. “No. I don’t.”

“And if we could – you know – figure this out,” she said haltingly, “like if you could be there while she was . . . with me, and not mind it – and if I could, you know, while you two were –“ She stopped. “Then I’m not taking her away from you,” she said, “because you’re _there._ We’re both _there._ Does that make sense? Nobody’s left out in the cold. Nobody’s alone.”

He turned and looked at her for a long moment, sizing her up.  She was perched on the edge of his bed, her big dark eyes earnest and a little bit imploring, and he felt a cold clutch of guilt squeeze at his heart.  He felt for her so deeply.  He wondered if she had any idea how transparent it was, her effort to hide her naked fear under this air of levelheaded efficiency.  What she was really trying to say, of course, was that she was afraid she was going to lose Abby to him.  That every night Abby was with him and not with her, she was lying awake in bed, staring up at the ceiling, wondering if she had been forgotten.  That she still didn't trust Abby's feelings yet, that she was afraid Abby and Marcus were real and Raven was just a fling.  The only thing that would fix this, of course, was time - they would all just have to wait it out - but it felt like such an _old_ thing to say, so useless in the face of her fear and insecurity.  Maybe Abby was right.  Maybe Abby had realized that any system that involved Raven spending half her nights lying awake worrying was never going to work in the long run.

He sighed.

“This is a terrible idea,” he said. “But if it’s important to you, I can try.”

“Good,” she said, brightening considerably, and reached down to unlace her boots.

“Oh,” he said startled. “You meant _now?_ ”

“Well, yeah,” she said.

“Raven, I was _sleeping.”_

“You’re not back on duty until midnight,” she pointed out. “That’s in three hours. This isn’t going to take three hours.”

“Raven –“

She stood up and pulled her shirt up over her head, then unzipped her jeans to pull them down. “Clothes off,” she said. “Let’s start with that. That’s going to be the first weird thing. The naked part.” She stripped quickly and efficiently down to her thin cotton shorts and camisole, thought about it for a moment, then pulled the camisole over her head as well, baring her breasts to him. She was all taut muscle and golden skin, and he was suddenly relieved they were getting this out of their systems now.  He thought he might be staring.  It would have been uncomfortable to get caught staring by Abby.

“Underwear off or on?” she muttered, more to herself than to her. “On, probably. Yeah. On. Like, kind of _ease_ into it.” She looked over at him, and saw him still fully dressed, in the soft cotton pants and shirt he slept in, still sitting motionless on the bed and staring at her.

“Come on, man,” she said impatiently. “Pants off. Don’t make it weird.”

“I’m sorry,” he said awkwardly. “I was . . . distracted.”

She gave him a look that was half exasperated eye roll, half flattered, but all she said was a brisk and snappish “Catch _up_ ,” with a gesture in the general direction of his clothes.

So he did.

And suddenly Raven was distracted too.

Older men had never been Raven’s thing, and she had never felt herself attracted to Marcus Kane. Still wasn't, really, in any kind of a raw, primal way. He didn’t rouse her a fraction of the degree that Abby did. But because of their new, strange, slightly surreal truce, she wanted to give this a try. She wanted to be game. She wanted to give a little in order to make this work.  _This had to work._

And it definitely helped, she thought as she watched him reluctantly stand from the bed and begin to undress, that he was a beautiful man. Really, truly beautiful. The pale, cold-eyed soldier he had been when she first met him, back on the Ark, was long gone, replaced by a rumpled, shaggy-haired war hero with tanned skin and scars all over. The ground had made him kind of . . . sexy.

Not to her. Obviously. But, you know. To other people, who were into that kind of thing.

He left his underwear on, presumably because so had she, and he seemed to be deferring to her. So for a moment they just stood there, in nothing but their underwear, looking at each other uncertainly.

“I told you,” said Raven finally. “This is why we need practice. Otherwise it’s just _super fucking awkward_.”

He nodded.

“You win,” he said. “I agree. Best to get the weirdness out of the way now.”

“Right.”

“Right.”

More silence.

“What’s next?” he finally said.

“You should kiss me, I think,” she said after a moment.

“ _Are_ we going to be kissing?” he asked, puzzled. “Is that something we’re going to need to practice?”

“I don’t know,” she said, “but it’s better to be sure.”

“Okay.”

“Okay.”

“Okay, so . . . Okay. I’m going to kiss you now,” he said, taking a few halting steps toward her. She nodded.

“I’m ready.”

He took a deep breath, and she could see him weighing whether or not she should be looking at her breasts - even though, you know, _there they were,_ right in front of him.  He reached out a hand and placed it on her bare shoulder.  It just sort of sat there for a minute.  Raven tilted her head and looked at it.

"Wow, slow down, you crazy animal," she said sarcastically, and he made a face at her.

"I'm working up to it," he retorted.  "Just . . . give me a minute."

Unsure what to do next, he moved his hand from her shoulder to her breast, and she burst out laughing.

"This was _your idea_ ," he snapped.

"I know!  I'm sorry!" she said, gasping for breath in between giggles.  "It's just . . . it's Marcus Kane's hand on my breasts, it's just _weird_."

He removed his hand.

"Okay, we're done for the night," he said, turning away from her.  "I'm going back to bed."

"I'm sorry," she said, grabbing his hand and pulling him back, stifling giggles.  "I'm sorry.  You're doing fine.  I won't make fun of you anymore."

"Raven, I think this is just too weird."

"We can do this," she said firmly.  "We just have to power through it.  Come on.  Want me to go scrounge up some booze?"

"I'm on duty in three hours, remember?" he said.  "We're going to have to do this sober."

"Crap."

"Your vote of confidence is so reassuring."

"I'm sorry!" she said, starting to giggle again.  "I'm sorry.  I'll be good." She shook it off, rolling her neck and shoulders like she was warming up for a fight.  "Game on, Kane, let's go," she said.  "Come on.  The sooner we do this, the sooner you can go back to bed."

He sighed.

"Fine," he cautioned, "but no laughing."

"None," she promised.  "Zip.  Zilch.  Nada.  I swear."

He took another deep breath and moved in close to her again, standing still for a moment while they both got their bearings.  They were within kissing distance, but he didn't make a move just yet.  Instead, he reached out a tentative hand and placed it on the curve of her waist, just above the band where the black cotton turned back into skin.  She didn't _flinch,_ exactly, but it was jarring.  She was so _aware_ of his hand, of his skin on her skin. He stood there for a second, awkward and uncertain, his hand on her waist, while they got used to each other, and eventually Raven reached up one hand and placed it around his neck, which brought them a little closer together, almost as though they were slow-dancing, except that they were both standing perfectly still, just breathing.  Kane smelled kind of forest-y.  It was nice.  Raven stood there for awhile, her fingers at the back of Kane's neck, fiddling with his hair a little bit - he had great hair - while the palm of his hand grew warmer and warmer where it rested against her hip.  It wasn't uncomfortable, exactly, but she was so aware of the fact that it was _Kane's_ hand, Kane's soft hair, Kane's bare chest pressing against her breasts, so while it wasn't unpleasant, it was also strange.

He bent his head down towards hers, just the tiniest bit, inching towards kissing her but not quite getting there.  He moved a little closer, then a little closer, and to silence the inexplicable hammering of her heart, tense and anxious inside her chest, she shot him an exasperated eyeroll.

"Oh my God," she said, “take _forever_ ,” and Marcus burst out laughing, snapping the last cord of tension between them.

 _"Christ,_ you're infuriating," he said with a grin, and kissed her.

They were both startled by it. Even though he had announced he was going to kiss her, even though he had moved in close enough to do it, even though they both knew it was coming. Still, when it finally happened, they both felt a zing of surprise shoot through their bodies.  His hand stayed on her waist and the other came around her back, pulling her in.  She kept the one hand in his hair, pulling his head down towards hers, and the other slowly found its way to his hard, bare chest, where it rested over his heart.  They kissed for a long time.  Against all probability, who would ever have imagined it, Raven found it extremely enjoyable. He was a good kisser, older and rougher than any man she had ever been with – not boyish like Finn or sleek like Bellamy or playful like Wick. His beard was scratchy and his mouth was firm and his arms were big and strong as they slid around her. Raven kissed Marcus Kane and Marcus Kane kissed her back and it was . . . really, really nice. Kind of great, even.

Raven pulled away first, a little breathless.

“Okay,” she said, trying to compose herself. “Good. Okay. Good drill.”

“Yeah,” said Kane, who she could see was also a little rattled. “Yes. Good.”

“I feel like we have that part down.”

“That part feels solid,” he agreed. “I think we can cross it off the list."

“Good,” she said.

“Good.  Good drill.  Okay, I'm going back to bed now."

“Kissing’s not going to be the weird part,” she said, stopping him.

"Oh God," he groaned, "you have more, don't you?"  He was never getting back to sleep.

“We’re going to be watching each other have sex with Abby _,"_ Raven continued as though he hadn't spoken. _"That’s_ going to be the weird part.”

“How do we practice for that?" he asked, eyeing her suspiciously.  "I mean, without bringing in Abby. Which would make it not so much practice as, you know, the actual thing.  Which sort of defeats the point.”

Raven walked over to the bed and pulled back the blanket to climb inside, then waved him over. He stared at her.

“Raven, that's my bed.  What are you doing in my bed?"

“There’s only one thing I can think of more intimate than watching each other have sex with Abby,” she said.

“What’s that?”

“Watching each other have sex _without_ Abby.”

He stared at her for a second before the penny dropped. Then, unaccountably - and kind of endearingly - he _blushed._

“You want me to –“

“Yes.”

“In front of you.”

“Yes.”

“And you’re going to –“

“That’s right.”

“Raven!"

"Kane!"

"You can't possibly be serious," he said, his face slightly horrified.

"What's your better idea?" she asked with a shrug.

"You leaving the room so I can go back to bed."

“Think of it this way,” she said reasonably. “Nothing else that happens with Abby there will feel _nearly_ this weird.”

“Raven, this is _insane."_

 "You'll be fine.  Just pretend I'm not here.  Wait, no, hang on, that defeats the purpose.  Okay, pretend Abby's here.  That will help."

"Raven, I'm not doing this," he said, glaring at her, arms folded.  She folded her own arms and glared back at him, and they stood there for awhile in a stalemate before he realized that there was literally no other way he was going to get her out of his bed so he could go back to sleep in it.  She was perfectly capable of sitting here for three hours, staring him down while the clock ticked away what little time remained before he had to get dressed and go to work.  He sighed, and she brightened immediately, knowing she'd won.

“I’ll go first, if you’d rather,” she said helpfully. “Or you can. Either way.”

“Are you –“ He paused. “Can you – are you ready to – I mean, right _now_?”

“I can get the job done,” she said.  "Why, how long does it take you?"

"Oh my _God_ ," he said, climbing into the bed next to her with a sigh, "this is _mortifying_."

"If you can't even answer a simple question -" she retorted, scooting over against the wall to make room for him in the tiny, cramped cot.

"I can do it, okay?" he snapped.  "I'm here, you win, I'll do it, just stop _talking_ about it."

"Sorry."

_"Christ."_

"So me first, or you first?" she asked again, rolling over to look at him as he stared uncomfortably up at the ceiling.

"I don't know," he said.  "You.  I guess."

"Okay," she said, nodding.  "I'll go first."

"Do I just lay here or do I watch?"

"You have to watch," she said, "that's the point.  This is a drill."

"Oh, good Lord."

"We're replicating real-world circumstances."

"Fine."

"So if you just lay there and, like, close your eyes and cover your ears -"

"I said _fine,_ Raven."

"Okay, I'm going.  Are you watching?"

He sighed and rolled over, pulling the covers away from her hips and thighs so he could see her.

"Fine.  Yes.  Here I am.  I'm watching.  Just . . . go ahead.  Let's get this over with."

"Okay," she said, and there was just the tiniest flutter in her voice that told him she was nervous too, which made him feel oddly comforted.  And then she began.

Raven was very, very aware of Kane's eyes on her, even with her eyes closed.  She could feel them on her body as she slipped her hand inside the black cotton of her shorts and began to stroke. She remembered the feel of Abby’s tongue between her thighs, the dazzling sensations of her soft mouth and warm breath, the way her hands had roamed everywhere on Raven’s taut golden skin, and the wetness began to escalate. Soon she was slick and hot inside, her fingers meeting no resistance as they fluttered everywhere. She could feel Kane's heavy warm weight on the bed next to her, and that did something to her too, for some reason, and the woodsy smell of him and the warmth of his body got all jumbled up with her thoughts of Abby.  So she wasn't _really_ touching herself and thinking of Kane, but she also wasn't _not_ thinking of Kane either.  Everything was all mixed up.

Kane, for his part, watched in a similarly confused combination of discomfort and arousal.  He could feel his cheeks flush hot and red with embarrassment as Raven began to make soft little sounds and her hips began to rise and fall ever so slightly, the fingers of her other hand clenching uselessly at the sheets of the bed.  In practical terms, he thought a little ruefully, it was a good idea that he had chosen to go last, since watching her was definitely speeding the process along.  He felt his body begin to grow hard and warm and ready as he watched Raven, imagining what it would look like to watch her with Abby - when it was Abby's hand there, instead of Raven's own.  His entire body tensed up as he watched Raven's movements accelerate, and reached out impulsively to brush a strand of loose hair out of her face.  It was probably a coincidence - it was almost certainly a coincidence - but she came almost immediately after that, with his hand still in her hair.  Her hips thrust upward over and over and she gave one breathy, strangled cry, and then collapsed back against the mattress, breathing heavily. He watched her for a moment as she came back to herself, and then she rolled over to him.

"Weird?" she asked with one eyebrow raised.

"Yes," he admitted.  "But not bad.  Just . . . intrusive.  I've never just _watched_ someone.  It feels more private, somehow."  She laughed a little.

"Well, it's my turn to feel voyeuristic and intrusive now," she said.  "Game time.  You're up." 

He lay back down beside her and felt her move to give him more room.  He could feel the warmth of her body, her still-panting breath, beside him, and he closed his eyes, and he thought about Abby.  Abby did this to him all the time - she liked touching him, liked the way he felt in her hands.  He imagined her soft hands on him, her eager smile, her warm mouth against his skin.  But because he could not un-notice Raven, lying in the bed next to him, it did no good to pretend she wasn't there, to pretend he was alone in his bed with Abby.  And he was surprised to realize, as his hand began moving faster and harder, that he did not mind having Raven beside him, watching, nearly as much as he should have.  His thoughts began to drift and he imagined Raven, flushed and panting with her hair all tangled up beneath her on the pillow, breathing hard and fast, her hands tangled in Abby's hair as Abby buried her mouth between Raven's thighs. He thought about the soft sounds Raven had made just now when she came, and he thought about the way Abby cried out when he was inside her, and the idea of hearing both at the same time was all it took.  He inhaled sharply and a low moan escaped him as he thrust once, twice, three times, then gave a great shudder and sank back down.

The moment it was over, he was cripplingly self-conscious again, but Raven seemed unfazed.

"Good drill," she said.  "We've got this.  It's gonna be fine.  Don't you think?  I think it's gonna be fine."

"Raven -" he began, but stopped, not sure what he really wanted to say.

"I told you it wouldn't take three hours," she said, hopping out of his bed and pulling her clothes back on.  "See?  You can still go back to sleep."

"Raven -"

“Tell her,” she said, urgently, insistently, and he looked at her then, her eyes big and serious and earnest. “Tell her.  Tell her that I think we can do this.”


	5. Raven and Marcus and Abby

 

But deciding to do something, of course, is not the same thing as doing it.

All three of them realized that saying the thing out loud - saying that they wanted to do it, that they were going to do it, that it was going to happen - made it real.  Which made it weird.  Every time Kane dropped by Raven's workshop with a repair order, they both looked everywhere but at each other.  Every time Raven had to deliver equipment to Medical, she hollered at Wick and sent him to do it.  Every time Abby and Kane sat across from each other in Council meetings, they kept their eyes carefully downcast to avoid inquiring stares from Bellamy and Lincoln. 

A week went by like this.  Then two.  Then three.  Abby found projects to keep her working in Medical until all hours of the night.  Raven’s makeshift workshop tent had a light on and clanking sounds nearly round the clock.  Kane took three overnight trips to Tondc in a nine-day period.  They all continued awkwardly avoiding each other, both in public and in private.  All three of them slept alone.  All three of them were visited by very conflicted (though undeniably arousing) dreams.  All three of them spent too many nights lying awake, staring up at the ceiling, wondering if this was just the worst idea in the entire world, if it was guaranteed to end in disaster, if just _thinking_ it meant that none of them would ever be able to look each other in the eye ever again.

It was not an auspicious beginning.  Nobody knew how to proceed next.  Nobody knew who was supposed to make the next move.  Should Raven just show up at Abby's door one night and knock?  Should Abby send them both an invitation?  Raven's questions about logistics began to seem, to all three of them, much less crazy than before.  Because, actually, none of them knew what to do now.

So far, things were not going well.

But then, one day, about two and a half weeks after Raven's "dry run" in Kane's bedroom, Unity Day rolled around, their first at Camp Jaha.  The camp threw a huge celebration, Jasper's moonshine got involved, and then.  Well.  I suppose you can guess.

***

The Camp Jaha kids called it “going up to the roof,” and Raven had no idea how Kane or Abby even knew about it.

See, there was a little alcove-shaped space in the rear corner of the crashed Ark ship, around the back from the main gates and mostly concealed from view, where you might, or might not, find a rickety metal ladder. (If you don't see it, too bad. Somebody else beat you to it. Tonight's not your night.) If the ladder was there, however, and if you climbed it up about forty feet, trying to ignore its rickety metallic creaking (it was a really shitty ladder) you would find yourself on a wide, flat expanse of the Mecha Station's exterior walls, in a space about the size of a small room, which was concealed – by virtue of the Ark ship's odd angles – from the ground below. It had low walls but was open to the sky, and on warm nights it was a popular spot for, well, exactly what you’d think.

“Terrific,” Raven had heard Bellamy mutter the first time he saw Lincoln and Octavia disappear up the ladder, pulling it up behind them. “We don’t have electricity or a way to grow food, but we _do_ have a makeout corner.” Raven had been happy to share in his disdain.  "So stupid," she agreed, refusing to acknowledge any feelings about the fact that the ladder was a piece of crap and her leg brace would never make it, and that she she had no one to go up there with anyway.

As far as Raven had ever observed, only the 48 knew about the roof - or, more specifically, knew what it was used for.  So she wasn't surprised to see - as she attempted to extricate herself from a drunken conversation with Monty, who had cornered her near one of the campfires with a half-empty bottle of moonshine in his hand and was attempting to explain to her how hands worked - that off in the dark distance someone was lowering the ladder and a shadowy figure was climbing down it.  Well, good for somebody, she thought, only a tiny bit bitterly.  She was mostly sober, and while drunk Monty was amusing, she was tired, and she had lost track of Abby in the crowd after the Unity Day toast an hour ago, and it was so loud out by the fires that she was beginning to get a headache.  She wasn't really in the mood for a wild drunk party and didn't particularly feel like diving back into the moonshine until she was. 

" . . . and then what happens is," Monty said excitedly, "like your brain like tells your hand what to do, like it sends a message through your - the things, what are the things called -"

"Nerves, Monty."

"Nerves.  And then your hand like does what your brain told it to, which is craaaaazy, and -"

"Monty," Raven interrupted, "here comes Harper.  You should take her over to the bar and get her a drink and then tell her what you just told me.  I bet she'll be fascinated."

"But -"

"Go," said Raven, shoving him over towards a slightly intoxicated Harper.  "Go tell Harper everything you know about hands."

He left, obediently, and Raven sent a silent apology to poor about-to-be-accosted Harper.  But it was every man for himself, and she needed to escape this party.  She disappeared into the shadows, keeping close to the walls of the Ark ship where she was less visible by the light of the perimeter fires, and rounded the corner to the back side of camp where all was darker and quieter . . . and where she suddenly found herself crashing headfirst into Marcus Kane.

"What are you-"

"Shhhh," he said urgently, clapping a hand over her mouth, and she looked up at him in puzzlement.  She pulled back from him slightly, and then realized where they were.

They were standing in front of the ladder.

The shadow coming down from the roof had been Kane.

A hot little pang of jealousy sliced into her heart.  Of course, she thought.  Of course he was up on the roof with Abby.  Of course they were together.  They had probably been together this whole time, sneaking around behind her back.  She was probably the only one who didn't know.  She was so stupid.  How could she have -

"I thought you'd never get rid of him," said Kane.  "I was about to come over and push him into the bonfire."

"What?"

"Monty," he said.  "He was talking at you forever.  I was just about done waiting."

"Waiting?"

He didn’t answer, but knocked twice on the metal panel, very lightly, and Raven was astonished to see the ladder lower itself down from the roof.

“Kane, what are you –“ she started to say, but lost all her words when he picked her up in his arms, as though she weighed nothing at all, slung her over his shoulder, grasped the metal rungs of the ladder, and began to climb.

“What the hell?” she exclaimed, bracing one arm around his neck to keep from falling.  "What are you doing?"

"You can't do ladders," he said.  "Because of your leg."

"But where are we going?"

"Up."

Raven sniffed suddenly, and turned an accusing eye towards Kane.  Of course, her head was draped over his back, ponytail flopping helplessly downwards, so he didn't see or care.

"You smell like moonshine," she said.

"Well.  Maybe.  Yes."

"You're drunk."

"That's a strong word."

"You're drunk and you're carrying me up an old busted ladder.  Oh God.  I'm going to die.  This is how I'm going to die."

"You're not going to die," said a quietly amused voice from above Raven's head, and a pair of small strong arms reached out and lifted her down from Kane's shoulder.  She turned, and there was Abby.  Kane pulled the ladder up behind them, stashing it in a far corner, and then there they were.

All three of them.

Alone.

On the roof.

“What took you so long?” said Abby to Kane, exasperated.

"It wasn't my fault," he said defensively.  "It was the Green kid.  He wouldn't go away.  I almost had her when she left the main fires and then he came outside and caught up to her and he would _not_ stop talking.  I was about ready to just march over and throw her over my shoulder and to hell with whoever saw me."

"Well, I'm glad you didn't," said Abby firmly, "that was _not_ our plan."

"Have you been up here all night?" said Raven to Abby, puzzled.  "I lost you after the toast."

"Well, somebody had to get here early and claim the spot,” she said reasonably. “I didn’t want some kid to beat me to it.”

"In the past we've had sort of a friendly rivalry with Octavia and Lincoln," said Kane.  "They've beaten us to this spot before, at very inconvenient times.  So I cornered Lincoln at the party to ask him some boring questions about Grounder politics while Abby snuck back here and pulled up the ladder."

"I think I saw them head off to the woods," said Raven.

"Good," said Abby, pleased.  "It worked."

“How do you guys even _know_ about this place?” Raven asked in astonishment. Kane shrugged.

“Everyone knows about this place,” he said.

“Yeah,” said Abby, “everyone knows. Even us. We’re not, you know, just because we’re –“

“We’re not _old_ ,” said Kane, “we know things.”

“We know things,” said Abby happily. “He _knows_ things, Raven.”

“Oh my God,” said Raven, finally noticing the bottle of moonshine in Abby’s hand and putting all the pieces together. “You are both _so drunk_.”

“No, no, it’s okay,” said Abby. “It’s okay. I’m only a _little_ drunk.”

“How drunk is Marcus?”

“Hardly at all,” he said proudly. “Because I had to do the ladder thing. The thing with the ladder. The thing where you have to –“

“You mean _climbing_?” said Raven, raising an eyebrow.

“Right. Climbing. So I’m good. I’m good. I only had one drink.”

“Four,” corrected Abby, and he nodded as if agreeing with her.

“Right. Between one and four drinks.”

“This is _insane_ ,” said Raven to Abby. “You’re the _Chancellor._ I can’t believe you’re spending Unity Day getting drunk by yourself on the roof.”

“I wasn’t,” she said. “I was waiting for you.” And she and Marcus exchanged a charged, deliberate look. “We were both waiting for you.”

Raven felt herself blushing a little, and bought herself a brief moment to compose herself a little by taking the opportunity to look around her for the first time. 

She had never been up to the roof before, and she loved it immediately.  It was a beautiful night, warm and clear, and they were high enough above the fires of Camp Jaha to see a thick carpet of stars overhead. It smelled green up here, and the constant roar of laughter and voices was dimmed a little by the low walls and the height. They were just about level with the tops of the trees outside the camp, so it felt sort of magical, like a bird's nest high in the treetops, sheltered from the world below.

Then she noticed that Abby had spread out a pile of thick blankets on the metal floor, like a makeshift bed.

With three pillows.

Raven swallowed hard.

“I’ve never been up here before,” she said, trying to sound conversational. Kane nodded.

"We'll get a better ladder," he said.  "We'll figure something out.  For next time."

"Next time?"

“Look at the stars, Raven,” said Abby suddenly, tilting her face upwards, a look of pure wonder in her eyes. “Look. They’re so pretty. Look how pretty they are.”

“Beautiful,” Marcus agreed, watching her with a small, private smile, but he wasn’t talking about the stars.

Abby held out her hand to Raven, who looked at it thoughtfully for a moment before reaching out and taking it. “Abby,” she began, but she didn’t get a chance to finish.

“Tonight,” Abby whispered to her, pulling Raven close and covering her face with kisses. “Let’s do it. Let’s do it tonight.”

“ _Here_?” asked Raven. “On the _roof_?”

“It’s the most private place in the whole camp,” Marcus observed matter-of-factly. “Unless you’d rather take your chances in the woods.”

“Abby has a _bed_ ,” said Raven. “Abby has _walls_.”

“Yeah,” said Kane pointedly, “and what’s on the other _side_ of Abby’s walls?”

And then Raven remembered.

Abby’s quarters were on the ground level, inside the remnants of the crashed Ark ship. Because she was Abby – doctor, Council member, Chancellor – she had rated one of the nicer rooms in that wing, which had not one but two windows to let in the light.

And windows meant exterior walls.

And set up directly in front of the exterior wall which separated Abby’s bedroom from the outside was a makeshift table with a mob of people around it.

“Shit,” said Raven. “Jasper’s moonshine still.”

Jasper was tending bar not six feet from the head of Abby’s bed. And the party showed no signs of abating, which meant the crowd around the barrels of booze would be there all night.  And Abby - at the risk of being, perhaps, indelicate - was not quiet in bed. 

Raven sighed.  Kane was right.  A mob of drunk, unruly, moonshine-fueled teenage partiers refilling their drinks all night long, separated by nothing but a dented metal wall from  . . . whatever the three of them were about to be doing.  No way.  Disaster.

Up here, on the other hand, it was darker, and quieter, and there was so much noise and chaos down below that they were as alone on the roof as if they were floating in space. 

“No one is going to come looking for us,” said Abby, kissing the hollow of Raven’s throat just below her ear, her breath soft as she whispered against Raven’s skin. “No one is going to know.  We have all night.” She slipped a hand underneath the soft faded cotton of Raven’s shirt and upwards, to lightly graze her fingertips over the soft round curves of Raven’s breasts. “And besides,” she whispered. “I heard you’ve been practicing.”

Raven looked over at Kane accusingly, but he just smiled, not remotely apologetic.

“We have,” he said. “We think you’ll be impressed.”

“So we’re doing this,” said Raven. “Right now. Right here. All three of us.”

“Yes,” said Kane.

“Yes,” said Abby.

And Raven, who had also had a little bit of moonshine, or maybe more than a little, and was feeling warm and loose, and had missed the feel of Abby’s touch, and who was feeling more warmly towards Kane than she ever had before because he had carried her up to the roof to look at the stars, finally nodded. 

"All right then," she said.  "Yes."

And she took Abby’s face in her hands and kissed her back.

They kissed for a long time, and Raven slowly began to realize that everyone was, in fact, the exact right amount of drunk. Not so intoxicated that their abilities were impaired, or even their judgment, really, but just drunk enough that once Abby’s mouth opened beneath hers, all warm breath and wet lips, and Marcus moved in towards them and slipped one arm around each of their waists, all discomfort vanished, and this began to seem like the best idea anyone had ever had.

Raven continued kissing Abby, urgently, almost frantically, their mouths moving against each other in desperation, and she felt – dimly, as though it were happening to someone else – movement around her legs and feet. Marcus was kneeling between them, carefully unlacing both of their boots. Abby’s shoes came off first, then Raven’s, and were carefully set aside. Then soft, muffled snapping sounds told her, as Abby’s mouth moved to her neck and she closed her eyes and sighed in pleasure, that Marcus had moved on and was removing Abby’s jeans. She heard the fabric slide down and moved her own hands to Abby’s now-bared waist, gripping her hips and pulling her in. Then she felt a sudden warmth and pressure at her back and realized it was her turn; Marcus had stepped in close, right behind her, so close she could feel his breath on her neck, and then there were two strong, rough hands on her waist, slipping down over her hips, sliding forward, and unfastening the button and then the zipper on her own jeans. If someone had ever told Raven that a day would come when Marcus Kane would be taking her pants off – that she would _want_ him to – that she would feel her body sink back against his, soaking in his strength, that as he pushed the fabric off her hips his hands would slide down against her skin and she would shiver where they touched her, that a part of her wanted very badly for his hands to continue moving lower still, to see what would happen – well. Who would believe such a thing. But there it was anyway.

Raven moaned softly, and even she wasn’t sure whether it was Abby’s hungry mouth on her throat, Kane’s rough hands on her thighs, or some hybrid of both that did it.

And then there was a series of metallic sounds and a sudden release of pressure, and she felt herself falling and rising simultaneously. Marcus had taken off her leg brace in order to pull off her jeans, and had caught her up in his arms as she began to stumble. He carried her, not over his shoulder like he had coming up the ladder, but gently, one arm hooked beneath her knees and the other around her back - _like he was a knight and she was a princess,_ she found herself suddenly, strangely, thinking - and then laid her down with infinite tenderness on Abby's makeshift rooftop bed.

Then he returned to Abby, who was still dressed from the waist up, and got back to work. 

Raven watched him hungrily as he pressed his hands flat against Abby’s stomach and pushed the fabric of her shirt upward, over her breasts. She raised her arms above her head so he could pull it off, slipping his hands around her breasts from behind and beginning to stroke them, taking the nipples between his thumb and forefinger and kissing her throat. Raven couldn’t wait any longer and tore off her own shirt and bra so she was naked too, tossing them aside, and held out her hands to Abby, who sank down onto the blankets beside her.

Marcus chuckled a little.

"Impatient girl," he said to Raven.  "I was getting to you next."

“Too slow,” said Raven with a grin, as she pulled Abby towards her. Nothing except thin cotton underwear now separated their bodies and she took advantage of it, wrapping her arms around the smaller woman’s waist and kissing her mouth, feeling their breasts push together, feeling the heat of Abby where Raven’s hip pushed between Abby’s thighs, feeling Abby shift until she was on top of Raven. Marcus shed his own clothes with very little ceremony and a great deal of haste, but by the time he lowered himself down to the ground beside them, proceedings were well underway.

Abby made the first real move, slipping a hand inside Raven’s black cotton shorts, causing her to gasp aloud. The flutter of light fingertips stirred her to madness as she felt Marcus’ hands all over their bodies – running his fingers up and down Abby’s back, or stroking Raven’s hair. It was lovely. It was all so lovely. How could she have thought she would mind this?  How could she have thought it would be strange?  Maybe it was the moonshine, maybe it was his fingers in her hair, maybe it was Abby's soft ecstatic purring sounds, but all sense of strangeness was gone, leaving nothing but a vast ache of desire in its wake.

Raven slipped her own fingers inside Abby’s shorts, and soon they had found their rhythm. Light touches turned firmer, more assertive, more demanding, one reciprocating the other. Raven crossed the event horizon first, crooking one exploratory finger up inside Abby, who cried out. It made Marcus smile. His eyes met Raven’s, dark with desire, and Raven realized for the first time just how desperately aroused he was by watching the two of them together.  It made her feel powerful, somehow.  It felt good to be able to control Marcus' pleasure, to arouse him without even touching him.

She added a second finger. Abby groaned and buried her face in Raven’s shoulder. Marcus practically licked his lips.

“More?” mouthed Raven to Marcus, and he nodded fiercely. A third finger caused Abby’s whole body to convulse. Then Raven curled her fingers, just a little, inside Abby, and as Marcus moved in closer, caressing Abby’s back, hands all over her skin, his eyes never left Raven’s. Their mouths were so close at this moment that they might have kissed. Marcus looked a bit as if he wanted to.  Raven felt her lips part, almost against her will, and thought maybe she wanted it too.  But Abby’s mounting orgasm had driven her frantic, and her hand began to move against Raven too, and suddenly Raven found herself pulled away from looking at Marcus as she flung her head back, cried out and was startled into orgasm - long before she had expected it - by Abby’s deft fingers. She shuddered, pulsed, and sank back, feeling Abby quiver on top of her and kiss her throat over and over.

She closed her eyes, dizzy and breathing heavily, the moonshine and the orgasm catching up to her at the same time, and she didn’t quite know if she was unconscious or fell asleep or just simply drifted away for awhile, but when she finally opened her eyes again she saw that Abby and Kane had moved on to Phase II without her.  Abby was lying beside Raven, flat on her back, with Kane’s dark head buried beneath her thighs. But there was no time for the pang of jealousy to return, because the second she returned to consciousness Abby and Kane both saw her and lit up with delight.

“Oh good,” said Kane, lifting his head and resting his chin on Abby's raised knee so he could look at Raven. “You’re back.”

“Was I asleep?”

“We didn’t know,” said Abby. “But you were just laying there with your eyes closed, smiling, and you looked so cute we didn’t want to interrupt.” She pressed an openmouthed kiss against Raven’s lips. “But don’t fall asleep on me again,” she said with a teasing smile. “We’re nowhere near done with you.”

“Come here,” said Kane, waving her over, and Raven moved – a little awkwardly, since her bad leg didn’t really like it when she tried to crawl on hands and knees – over to where he knelt between Abby’s thighs.

“Class is in session,” he said, with a giddy drunken grin on his face.

“What does that mean?”

“Show me how you do it,” he said quietly, “and I’ll show you how I do it, and we can compare notes.”

“Compare notes?”

“Yeah. You’re good at this part. She told me.”

“She _told_ you?” Raven blushed furiously and couldn’t meet his eye. “She _talks_ about me? About what we – about –“

“Oh, yeah,” said Marcus. “Sometimes she’ll tell me what to do, like, ‘Right there, that’s how Raven does it, do it the way Raven does.’ But I don’t know what she means.”

“What are you two whispering about?” said Abby.

“This is a _strategy session_ ,” said Kane importantly, “we are stragetizing. Straget – strateg – hang on.”

“Strategizing,” offered Raven.

“Yes! _Strategizing_ ,” said Kane. “So you just stay where you are. While we _strategize_.”

There was a dim, distant part of Raven's still-mostly-sober-ish mind that called out to her that this ought to feel strange, going down on Abby while Kane leaned in and watched her.  But she had long since ceased listening to that part of her mind, and found that coldly practical voice entirely drowned out by a warm wave of dangerous excitement.  So she parted Abby's thighs, bent her head down, and began.

Marcus Kane had never considered Raven Reyes in any kind of a sexual capacity until she and Abby began sleeping together. After that, of course, it was impossible not to. Still, he wouldn’t have said that he was attracted to her, or felt anything for her particularly, until that night when she came to his room for her strange, peremptory “dry run” and hovered over his shoulder, smelling tangy and sweet and salty and breathing warmly into his skin while he made himself come. It had changed something between them in some fundamental way he couldn’t quite name. He still, at this moment, was not sure if he wanted to sleep with her himself – on the whole, he thought not, it still felt far too strange – but it was impossible to deny that watching Raven devour Abby was the most erotic thing he had ever seen. He felt himself grow hard and heavy again as her hot, pink little tongue slicked Abby’s thighs with wetness, as her dark head bobbed up and down.

Abby’s hips began to rise and fall to the rhythm of Raven’s movements, and he could feel Abby’s orgasm begin to crescendo and swell up around her. He leaned in as close as he could get, his face so near Raven’s that his mouth was practically touching her cheek, and he watched. Raven varied long, slow licks up and down the center of Abby’s soft wet folds with sharp, hard little flicks of her tongue against her desperately sensitive clit. She never stayed too long in one place, and she changed direction just often enough that every sensation was unexpected, a surprise.

“Teach me,” he said in her ear. “Teach me how to do it like that.”

And she motioned him downwards, as Abby spread her legs wider to accommodate them both, and Kane’s tongue joined Raven’s. She led, he followed. Everywhere her tongue caressed, his did too. And sometimes - whether by accident or design, neither of them knew - their lips and tongues met in a soft, hungry kiss against Abby's wetness, licking both her and each other at the same time.  Abby had never felt anything like it, and the force of two mouths on her at the same time sent her so close to the edge again that Raven pulled away, and beckoned Kane to do the same, to let her cool down for a moment, to draw it out.

“You try,” said Raven, and motioned to Kane to take over while she crawled her way back up the blanket to lay next to Abby, curling her arms around the smaller woman’s body and kissing her shoulder as Marcus bent his head and set back to work. He followed her instructions exactly – which she could tell because Abby’s upper body went boneless and soft inside Raven’s arms almost immediately. Patiently, fervently, Marcus ate and drank from Abby’s hot center, leaving her weak and trembling, and Raven knew Abby’s orgasm was fast approaching. She kissed her way from Abby’s shoulder to her breast, feeling a warm wetness between her own thighs, which Abby was unfortunately too distracted to help her with. She would have to wait, then. Abby was writhing and moaning and her hands were uselessly clenching and unclenching against the blankets and she was so dizzy she hardly knew which way was up, let alone what to do to bring Raven along with her. Raven kissed her breasts and throat, harder and harder, feeling her arousal escalate to a height that was nearly excruciating.

Then, suddenly, unexpectedly, a hand grazed her thigh, inching towards the hot wetness, and she sat up on her elbows with a start to see that Marcus, face still buried inside Abby, had slipped a hand over to her, almost absentmindedly, and was stroking her as well. Raven was startled, but not in a bad way; there was something so _courteous_ about it, so thoughtful and attentive, that it made her feel a warm wave of liking and affection for him. Marcus Kane was better at reading people than anyone else at Camp Jaha, and he understood the very darkest depths of Raven’s fears – fear of being left out, fear of losing Abby to him, fear of inadequacy, fear of being too young or too inexperienced or too this or not enough that or failing in some way to be what Abby wanted. Marcus Kane was making it his mission tonight to make sure that Raven was always connected. He would not leave her out in the cold.

And so she lay there, on her back, beside Abby, pressing kisses against her skin, and feeling Marcus Kane’s big, strong hand slide slickly through her wetness until suddenly, startlingly, he found the hard bud of her clit, and _oh._

She gasped. Her thighs jerked upward reflexively, pulling him in deeper and deeper.  Later, she was sure, she would have thoughts about what it meant that Marcus Kane’s fingers had been inside her, and how weird that was, how unexpected, how very much the last thing she would ever have predicted, but that was a problem for tomorrow’s Raven. Tonight’s Raven simply leaned over and began kissing Abby feverishly, their wild crescendos towards orgasm echoing through one another’s bodies as they panted and gasped into each other’s hot, open mouths. It was so raw, so fierce, kissing Abby like this as they were both about to come, and Raven was able to notice things about kissing Abby that she would never have observed if she had also been half distracted by touching her. This way, they could both simply lose themselves in the kissing, and kissing Abby was glorious. Her mouth was soft and firm at the same time, her breath was warm and heavy and sweet, and she sometimes closed her eyes and leaned her forehead against Raven’s and breathed her in with a focused intensity that was, if not love, as close as Raven had ever come in her life with anyone except maybe Finn.

Marcus’ gentle coaxing allowed Raven to keep pace with Abby, his fingers moving slowly but purposefully to propel her forward, and it was pure bliss. It was a strange sensation, because Raven still didn’t feel, not really, as though she and Marcus were lovers, as though she and Marcus were having sex with each other, as though she and Marcus would ever have sex with each other. If there was such a thing as one person stimulating another person to an absolutely shattering orgasm but in an entirely friendly, companionable way, that is what Marcus did to Raven. She lay there, clutching Abby in her arms, their mouths hot and urgent on each other, while Marcus, head buried between Abby’s thighs, took Raven’s clit between his thumb and forefinger and manipulated it so deftly that she erupted with a great shuddering cry at the exact same moment that Abby did.

God, he was good.

The two women came together, hard, shaking and trembling, in each other’s arms, pressing hot wet kisses into each other’s mouths, breathing heavily and slowly returning to earth. Raven felt movement at her back as Marcus crawled back up to join them, stretching out on the other side of Abby. He lifted the back of his hand to his mouth, which was still damp with Abby, but Raven shook her head and pulled his hand away to stop him.

“No,” she said impulsively. “Kiss me. I want to taste her.”

Marcus’ expression of surprise turned very quickly into an impish, affectionate grin, and he nodded.

“All right,” he said, beckoning to her. “Come here.”

She rose up onto her hands and crawled forward, over Abby’s prone body, where Marcus met her, as they faced each other over the sweaty moonlit skin of Abby’s bare stomach. And then she took his face in her hands, and she kissed him.

He tasted so deliciously of Abby that she felt herself begin to dissolve. She licked the taste of Abby off his lips, and he licked it back from her. She nibbled on his bottom lip, and he responded by caressing the inside of her mouth with a hungry tongue. She could feel Abby sit up, move towards them, could feel the heat of her body pressing them closer as she looped one arm around Raven’s waist and one around Kane’s, pulling them closer together.

If this was what it was going to be like, thought Raven, she would share Abby every night if she had to.  Because, if she was being really honest with herself, she really, really liked kissing Marcus Kane.

Like, a lot.

“I can’t help but notice,” said Abby, watching the two of them kiss each other with increasingly hot desperation, “that Raven and I have both had several turns already and you, my darling, have not had one. That seems unfair.”

Raven pulled back a little.

“Yes,” she said, looking into Marcus’ eyes, dark with desire. “It’s Kane’s turn.”

Abby came around behind Raven just then, palming her bare breasts with both her hands – eliciting a rough gasp – and whispering in her ear.

“Do you want to? Or would you rather watch?”

Raven felt her pulse begin to race.

“Do I want to . . . with Kane?” she asked, not sure how she felt. She looked at him. He looked at her.  Her heart was pounding and could feel them both weighing it, giving it real consideration. She thought maybe he wanted to. She thought maybe she wanted to.

But not right now. Not the first time.

No, tonight she was not ready.

Abby saw it in her eyes and nodded. “Okay,” she said, with a wicked grin, “then we’d better give you a very good show. Lie back down, where you can see.”

“How do you want us?” asked Marcus, and Raven looked at him blankly.

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“You’re part of this,” he said, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. “You’re in charge. You tell us what you want us to do. How do you want us?”

She swallowed. Hard.

“So I can tell you anything,” she said, “and you’ll do it.”

“Anything,” he nodded.

_Wow._

“Okay,” she said, trying to sound braver than she felt, as Abby adjusted the pillows against the low wall so that Raven was comfortably propped up.

They waited expectantly for their instructions before Raven finally spoke.

“From behind,” she said decisively. “Facing me. So I can see you both at the same time.”

Marcus and Abby looked at each other. Abby’s face was flushed with excitement, and she could see quite plainly how aroused Marcus was. Abby sank down onto her hands and knees, face within kissing distance of Raven, one hand braced on either side of Raven’s hips, and Marcus knelt behind her. Then Raven nodded, and she watched Abby’s entire face light up, eyes wide, mouth open in a slack O, as Marcus entered her.

Raven was surprised to find that she could have watched Marcus make love to Abby all night long. It was intoxicating, the way his big sun-browned body thrust into her tiny frame, the way his breath deepened into short harsh gasps as he slipped inside. Raven watched with enormous interest, heat rising between her hungry thighs ( _Down, girl, you already had your turn,_ she chided herself), as Marcus’ heavy, sleek, massive cock drove deeper and deeper inside Abby, and she finally ceased resisting, slipping a hand down to touch herself. Abby’s moans were killing her. Her whole body was on fire.

“Kiss her,” said Marcus, looking up from Abby for a moment to see Raven stroking herself. “Kiss her.” It was not a command, it was permission. Encouragement. There was something really sweet about how careful he was to make sure Raven didn't feel left out. And so, as Marcus’ heavy body thrust and shuddered, Abby turned her face towards Raven, eyes wide with dizzy and pleasure, mouth parted in panting gasps, and Raven pressed her own open mouth against Abby’s, swallowing the other woman’s cries of ecstasy. Abby kissed her desperately, licking and nibbling at Raven’s lips and tongue, and every thrust from Marcus drove Abby’s kiss deeper into Raven’s mouth.

Abby’s rising climax left her dizzy and faint, and eventually her hands and knees could no longer support her. She sank down on top of Raven, writhing against her as Marcus thrust. Raven wrapped one arm around the curve of Abby’s sweaty back, pushing the damp braid aside, and slipped the other one down between their bodies to stroke Abby’s clit, which drove the older woman to a loud cry of desperation that only urged Marcus on harder. Abby took one of Raven’s breasts in her mouth, tonguing the hard hungry nipple as her lips suckled the soft skin. Every movement from Marcus sent her deeper into Raven’s arms, as though he were thrusting into both of them somehow, and Raven was surprised at how aroused she was by it.

He caught her eye, then, and gave her a nod, gesturing downwards toward Abby, and Raven understood immediately that he was signaling to her that he was about to come and wanted her to stroke Abby harder so she would come at the same time with him. She nodded back, _message received,_ and obediently took Abby’s clit between her thumb and forefinger, seizing the other woman’s mouth with her own and melting back into her. Abby gasped at her touch, and even though she had come so hard just a few minutes ago, Abby’s writhing motions and soft little gasping cries were stirring Raven to yet another desperate state of arousal. She had never imagined that watching Kane with Abby would do this to her, but she was practically incoherent with desire. And somehow the weirdest thing about it was that it didn’t even feel weird – staring openly at a flushed, panting, sweaty Marcus as he grasped Abby’s hips and pressed himself forward into her where they both lay on top of Raven.

And then it happened. A few strokes from Raven, a few thrusts from Marcus, and Abby burst. She cried out over and over again, shuddering, trembling, shaking, face buried in Raven’s breasts. Marcus followed her shortly after, and somehow it did not seem strange to either of them that Marcus came, hard, with a loud groan, inside Abby, while grinning at Raven, who grinned back like they were partners in crime.

They all three lay there for a long moment, breathing heavily, before Abby, who had come so hard that time that she was only half-conscious (Raven suspected she would drift off to sleep within moments) murmured quietly, “Raven didn’t. Marcus, Raven didn’t.”

Marcus looked at Raven.

“It’s okay,” she said.  "Really.  I'm good."

He shook his head emphatically.  “No,” he said. “We both did. You should too.”

“It’s cool, Kane, you don’t have to –“

And then suddenly, his hand was stroking her again, his heavy warm body pressed on top of hers, his mouth at her throat.

“I want to,” he murmured. “Let me. I want to.”

She could not speak, could only nod, and open her thighs wider in mute invitation. She was still soaking wet from the last time and he slipped inside her again, easily, effortlessly. But this time it was a little different. This time he was not occupied with Abby while helping Raven to keep pace. This time he was concentrating the full force of his powerful Marcus Kane-ness on Raven only. He kissed her mouth with such intensity that all the air left her lungs and when he finally pulled away, she gasped like a drowning woman. And his hands, his strong deft hands, caressed her and stroked her and traced idle patterns in her sticky wetness until suddenly three fingers were inside her, Marcus Kane was _inside her,_ his whole body on top of hers, and she was thrusting into him and he was moving against her, and even though he was so sated from Abby that there was no way he could possibly be ready again, it felt so very much like the real thing that she suddenly realized she had been wrong, so wrong, she had been wrong about what she thought she wanted - or didn't want - and he felt it too, as his body pressed her down into the blanket-covered ground, she wanted it, he wanted it, they were both staring at each other and saw the realization dawn at the same time, and so he redoubled his energy, determined to make this one count, so he curled his fingers deep inside her and Raven nearly screamed as he touched a place deep inside her no one else had ever touched before and something was happening to her whole body, she had never felt like this before, his thumb was on her clit and his mouth was on her mouth and his body was pressed against her body and as Abby watched them, smiling sleepily through half-closed eyes, Raven felt herself coming closer, closer, closer, felt her entire body catch fire, and then there it was, she closed her eyes and cried out, over and over, hips thrusting up against Kane, who held her close and kissed her throat and stayed inside her until she had come three times, right in a row, and collapsed like a rag doll in his arms.

As she felt herself drift off to sleep, sandwiched between them, with Marcus warm and heavy at her back and Abby facing her, draping her arms over Raven’s waist, she closed her eyes and breathed them in and felt safer, somehow, than she had ever felt in her life.

* * *

Marcus had been the last to fall asleep the night before and was the last one awake the next morning. The harsh, unfiltered sunlight beating down on the harsh metal of the roof roused him to consciousness and he squeezed his eyes shut, trying to block it out.  He could hear quiet sounds of movement around him, low voices and clinking glass nearby, and off in the distance, the sounds of Camp Jaha slowly waking up from a long, drunken night.

He yawned and stretched.

"Good morning, Sleeping Beauty," said Raven Reyes' amused voice, and that was when Marcus suddenly remembered where he was - and what had happened the night before.

“Oh God,” he said. “Oh God, oh God. We’re on the roof.”  And then he made the mistake of opening his eyes, which were instantly blinded by piercing white sunlight, stabbing into his fuzzy, hungover head like a pair of hot needles.

“He’s brilliant,” said Raven to Abby, “ _he_ should be the Chancellor,” and he heard them both laughing.

“No,” he said, blearily, trying to sit up and collect himself, “I mean, how the hell are we all three going to get down from the roof without anyone noticing? I have to carry Raven. People are going to see me coming down the ladder with Raven.”

“Relax,” said Raven cheerily, “I’m on it.”  She didn't sound hung over at all.

“What do you mean, you’re on it?” he said suspiciously, rubbing his eyes. That was when he noticed Abby carrying a bag with at least seven empty moonshine bottles from Jasper’s still.

“Oh my God, did we drink all of that?" he exclaimed in utter horror.

“Please,” said Abby, rolling her eyes. “You’d be dead.  Get dressed."

“I told you,” said Raven, “I’m on it.  That bag's part of the plan.  I sent Abby on some errands when we woke up about an hour ago.  Just follow my lead."

"Raven -"

"She's on it, Marcus," said Abby with a grin, and Kane sighed, stood up, and hunted around for his clothes. The women were already dressed.  He was not sure how to feel about the fact that neither of them looked away as he stood, entirely naked, and put his clothes back on.

"All right," he finally said, running his fingers through his hair in a halfhearted attempt to straighten it.  "Lead the way."

Raven gathered up the folded blankets and pillows and motioned to Kane.

"Okay, pick me up," she said.  "We're going down first."

He took her in his arms to lift her, and the sudden closeness brought back all the memories of the night before, and he could feel both of them begin to grow a little awkward.  He had not realized, until those final moments when he slipped his hand inside her and made her cry out, how badly he wanted her.  And he had seen, from the way her eyes grew dark and hazy with desire at the feel of him, that she wanted him too.  That part was new.  That was unexpected.  And in the harsh, blinding light of day, he could tell that neither of them were sure what to do.

Still.  First things first.  They had to get off the roof.

"Pick me up," she said again, and he did, slinging her over his shoulder casually, like he had before, and began to descend the ladder.  Sure enough, the second his feet touched the ground, Kane heard voices behind them and looked up to see Jasper and Monty staring, openmouthed, as he stepped off the final rung with Raven in his arms. He blushed and looked at the ground, but Raven was ready.

“Uh, hey guys,” said Monty. “How, um –“ He paused and turned away to stifle a laugh – “how's it going?"

Raven hopped down out of Kane's arms and turned to them, arms folded, eyes narrowed into slits.

"You don't think I can see what you two dumbasses are thinking?" she snapped.

Jasper gestured to the ladder.

"Hey," he said.  "I don't judge."

Raven delivered a magnificent eyeroll.

“Yeah,” she said sarcastically. “I was up on the roof with _Kane_. We were _totally doing it_. Ha ha.”

Jasper and Monty could not look at each other. Jasper was biting his lip. Monty was wrinkling his nose. They were both about to burst out laughing.

“Whatever, dummies,” she said, in an exasperated voice. “You were up there too.”

This stopped them in their tracks.  Marcus, delighted, almost applauded before he remembered to keep his face expressionless and stern.

_“What?”_

“Oh my _God_ ,” Raven laughed, “you don’t remember? Monty, how much of that stuff did you _have_?”

"What are you talking about?" said Monty, but with just enough uncertainty in his voice that Marcus instantly knew that Raven had nailed it.  Monty had been drunk when she talked to him last night, and she had gambled - correctly - on him having continued to drink himself into oblivion along with the rest of the camp. 

Bellamy rounded the corner just then and froze, seeing Kane – one hand still on the ladder – standing beside Raven, clutching an armful of pillows and blankets.

“I don’t even want to know,” he said stiffly.

“This is what I get,” said Raven, “for being the only sober person in this whole goddamn camp. There were like _fifteen_ of us up there, idiots. The whole party moved up to the roof. Do _none_ of you morons remember _any_ of what happened last night?”

Bellamy eyed her with a mix of suspicion and uncertainty, and Kane realized that he, too, was frantically trying to retrace his own drunken steps from the night before, and _he_ wasn't sure either.  Just then, as if on cue - maybe she was - the clinking of glass sounded overhead and Abby descended the ladder, bag of moonshine bottles prominently in hand.

“She’s been up there all morning cleaning up,” said Raven as Abby, who looked far more fresh-faced and sober than Marcus thought she had a right to, hopped down off the ladder.  "The whole place was trashed.  Seriously, guys, _none_ of you remember? Monty,” she said, turning to him, “you went back to the bar to get more booze for us like _twice._ Don’t you remember?”

He looked thoughtful. “I remember bringing a bottle from Jasper’s table to . . . someone,” he said finally, “but I can’t remember where. Was it here? It must have been here.”

“I was at the bar all night,” said Jasper. “I didn’t go up to the roof. I woke up next to the bar.” Raven raised an eyebrow, then reached over and pulled his goggles out of the bag full of clinking glass on Abby’s arm.

Oh, well-played, Raven, thought Marcus delightedly, watching Jasper's brow furrow in utter bafflement.

“Then how did _these_ end up in Abby’s post-party cleanup pile?” she said skeptically.

Abby thrust the entire bag at him.

"I believe _all_ of this belongs to you, young man," she said, in her most Disappointed Mother Voice, and Raven could not resist a fleeting, conspiratorial grin at Marcus.  It was a flawless performance.  Jasper took the bag meekly, head lowered in mortification.  "Next time you kids decide to have a rooftop party, clean up after yourselves.  Only one of you is my kid, and she isn't even here, so don't make me do this again."

"Sorry, Abby," said Monty.

"Sorry, Abby," said Jasper.

"Sorry, Abby," murmured Bellamy, which surprised Raven and Marcus so much that they both almost lost it.  Even _Bellamy_ had swallowed it.

"There are dozens more of these out by the campfires," she said, "and that bar better be gone by the end of the day.  I don't want us getting rats and raccoons in the camp because you kids left half-empty liquor bottles everywhere."  And she pointed the way back to the front gates.  "Go.  You're all on cleanup duty." 

They sighed and headed back towards the campfires.  Raven walked along with them, without even a glance back at Kane and Abby, playing her part perfectly.  "Thanks for the lift, Kane!" she called over her shoulder, but that was it.

Flawless.

“Damn, Jasper, what did you put in this batch?” whispered Monty as they turned to go. “I don’t remember _any_ of this.”

“I don’t know, man!” said Jasper desperately. “It was the same as last time! We must have had more than we thought.”

“How did you get up the ladder?” said Bellamy suddenly. “You can’t climb ladders.”

 _Dammit,_ thought Kane, who was following with Abby at a discreet distance.  _They were so close._ But no, Raven was ready for this too.

“Kane and Abby came up to join the party last night,” she said matter-of-factly, “and Kane carried me up with them. Then, when the rest of you losers sobered up and staggered back to your rooms, nobody would carry me back down the ladder.  And the grownups had had a little more moonshine than they could handle” – with a mischievous gesture in Abby's direction – “and crashed out right there on the roof. So I was stuck up there until Kane woke up.”

“So you guys all, like, slept on the roof?"

“It wasn’t too bad,” she said. “Someone had left blankets and pillows up there.  I feel a little bad.  I think our party might have crashed somebody’s date."

Bellamy sighed. “Jasper, man, seriously, you need to start watering that stuff down.”

Raven laughed.

"You don't even know the half of it," she said.  "Oh, the things I've seen."

“Was it weird?” Monty asked her.  "With -"  He gestured back towards Kane and Abby.  "Them."

“What do you mean?”

“Kane and Abby,” he whispered. “You know they’re, like, a _thing,_ right? They think nobody knows but they totally know.”

“I know,” she said.

“And you were, like, up there with them?” said Jasper. “Like all night?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh my _God_ ,” exclaimed Monty. “They _totally did it_ while you were asleep.  I bet you _anything_."

“They _totally did_!” said Jasper, laughing. “Oh _man,_ Raven, they were probably like going _at it_ while you were passed out like _right next to them_.”

"You kind of had a threesome with Kane and Abby!" Monty hooted with laughter.  "High five!" 

He held out his hand to her, and she shut it down with a withering glare.

"For God's sake," she snapped at them.  "Both Kane and Abby had way more to drink than I did.  They _crashed,_ you guys.  _Hard._ They're not used to this stuff like we are."

"They might have, like, woken up -"

"Yeah, maybe they like woke up in the middle of the night and _then_ they did it."

"Both of you shut up," said Bellamy, exasperated.  "You're being gross."

"I promise you," said Raven, slinging one arm around Jasper and one around Monty as they entered the bottle-strewn courtyard.  "If Abby Griffin and Marcus Kane had sex on that roof right next to me, I _think_ I would have noticed."


	6. Marcus and Raven

 

Raven's plan was so successful that within four or five hours, everyone had a crazy story about the Unity Day party on the roof (which none of them actually remembered), and the three of them were safe from further prying.  Which was a relief, since now that the ice had been broken they wanted to do it again, immediately, preferably every single night.  But opportunities to meet in secret were few and far between.  They did not all sleep in the same wing of the ship, for example; Abby's quarters were on the lower level, with windows facing out toward the front gates, but Kane was down a long hall with a creaking metal floor and seven other sleeping quarters between them.  And Raven, who was shacked up with the 48, was in another wing altogether, in the communal bunk rooms one level up (that is, when she didn't sleep in her workshop or her tent outside).  So even though they were all more or less thinking about each other all the time (in ways both enjoyable and, occasionally, when they were in public, embarrassing), there was not an immediate opportunity for them to test out their newfound triad sober, without the assistance of moonshine.

This was not to say that they were lying awake every night, unsatisfied.  Raven stopped sending Wick with her equipment deliveries to Medical and began taking everything herself, waiting until she saw Jackson leave the building and then darting in to drop off the repaired heart monitor, very quickly shove Abby up against a wall, unzip her jeans and thrust her fingers deep into Abby's wetness while burying her face in Abby's neck.  Or Abby might drop by the workshop to do "physical therapy" on Raven's leg, lock the door and lay Raven out on top of the cold metal work table full of broken electronic equipment so she could pull down Raven's jeans far enough to put her tongue to work.  And Kane got his own private time with Abby - sometimes his fingers found her under the table during Council meetings, bringing Abby to a fierce orgasm she would have to cover with a coughing fit to avoid baffled stares from Sinclair, Lincoln, Bellamy and the rest of the Council.  Sometimes he braved the creaking metal hallway between their bedrooms at night when everyone else was in bed.

So, no, it wasn't like before.  No cold beds, no nervous avoidance.  Plenty of orgasms to go around.

So what was missing?  Why didn't it feel the same?

Abby was the one who realized it first.  She saw the truth plainly on Marcus and Raven's faces that night on the roof.  That was the piece that was missing.  They were no longer two pairs; they were simultaneously a unit of three, and three units of two.  There was an Abby-and-Marcus unit, and they were just fine.  There was a Raven-and-Abby, and they found plenty of opportunities to enjoy themselves.  And there had been that Raven-and-Abby-and-Marcus night on the roof, with the moon and the moonshine, which they were all eager to replicate.

But there was also, now, a Raven-and-Marcus, and it did no one any good to pretend that there wasn't.  And everything between the three of them would feel incomplete and out of balance until that particular unit got its bearings.

Abby was wild with anticipation for the many, many future nights they all had ahead of them where she could not only enjoy them both but watch them enjoy each other.  On nights when she was alone, she could not stop imagining it.  Maybe Marcus would throw Raven up against the wall and take her standing up, with her good leg wrapped around him for better leverage.  Maybe she would push him down onto his back and ride him from above, with Abby behind her for support and balance.  Maybe Raven had an entirely different collection of soft pleasure sounds she only made with a man inside her, sounds Abby had not even had the chance to hear her make yet.  The speculation was endless.  Yet, wisely, Abby decided that she would need to give them both a little breathing room to get used to each other on their own, before they found themselves together in front of her. The first time might be awkward; as much as she desperately wanted to see it, she sensed it might be better in the long run to let them go at their own pace.

So she left.

Lincoln was still _persona non grata_ with several of the Trikru leaders after choosing to stay with Octavia at the Battle of Mount Weather instead of retreating with them.  But relations were warming, and Indra had agreed to a parlay with Abby to discuss ongoing relations between the Sky People and the Grounders, and to begin creating a more sustainable long-term plan for how the two communities would share the resources pillaged from the bunker.  Commander Lexa had lost a great deal of political ground - part of the reason Clarke had remained in Polis so long, to help her shore up her strategic alliances - and Abby had been tasked by Clarke with helping to make sure Trikru was still in Lexa's camp.  Offering to share the resources of Mount Weather was the ace up her sleeve.

She could have sent Lincoln on his own to make the initial introduction and joined him the following week for the summit.  But she didn't.  Lincoln brought along Octavia, Bellamy, and David Miller, and when they left, Abby left with them.  She said goodbye to both Raven and Marcus separately, and said the same thing to both of them:

"I'm going to be gone at least two weeks, and my bed is way nicer than yours.  Feel free to sleep in there if you want to."

She did not tell Kane she had also offered this to Raven, and she did not tell Raven she had also offered it to Kane. 

There.  If they needed more of a push than that, there was nothing else she could do.

* * *

Marcus, who knew very well that Abby's mattress was a hundred times better than his, packed up a pile of things and moved into Abby's room the day she left.  He had it entirely to himself for three nights.  On the fourth, Raven showed up.

Tired of her cold metal bunk, tired of sharing a room with seven other people, tired of missing Abby, she finally gritted her teeth and decided that it was better to be in Abby's bed without Abby than her own bed without Abby, and Abby wouldn't have offered if she didn't really mean it.  So she told Monroe (her bunkmate) that she was going to sleep in the tent for the next few nights while the weather held, pulled a pair of cotton pants over her underwear, and crept slowly through the ship to Abby's quarters.  She was far more crafty than Marcus and knew exactly where to step to avoid the creaking metal floor, so she slipped down the hall entirely unnoticed. Abby's door was unlocked.  She slid the door open, stepped noiselessly inside, and closed it behind her.

"You couldn't sleep either, I take it?" said the quiet, amused voice of Marcus Kane from somewhere behind her, and she was so startled that she almost knocked over Abby's desk.  She turned and saw him lying in Abby's bed.  He was shirtless, only about half-covered in blankets, and the moonlight streaming in from the high windows lit him so perfectly that Raven almost laughed out loud.  It was ridiculous.  It was all so ridiculous. 

"Why are you smiling?" he said.

"She told you to use her bed while she was gone, didn't she?"

"Yes."

"She said the same thing to me," said Raven.  "And then I walk in here and you're all -" she gestured at his bare chest.

"I'm all what?" he said.

"Just laying there, all moonlight-y and whatever.  It's just so . . ."

"So what?"

" _Unsubtle_ ," she said, and he laughed at that.

"I could say the same to you," he said, "walking in here with half a shirt on and your hair down."  She wrapped her arms self-consciously over her thin camisole, suddenly acutely aware that she wasn't wearing a bra under it.

"What's wrong with my hair?"

"Nothing," he said.  "It's perfect.  I've just never seen it down.  You never wear it like that."

She couldn't quite look at him, after that, and stared down at the floor.

"You startled me half to death, by the way," she said, apropos of nothing, but he took the subject change with equanimity.

“Well, you scared me a little too,” he said, “so we’re even. I was half asleep and you woke me up.”

“Well, I half apologize,” she said, and he chuckled.  "I didn't mean to interrupt," she said.  "I didn't know you'd be here.  Obviously.  I just needed a break from the bunk rooms.  And my terrible mattress."

"Me too," he said.  "Well, the mattress part.  I have my own room.  But Abby has the only decent bed in all of Camp Jaha and it seemed a shame to waste it."

"That's what I thought," said Raven, agreeing.  "Too bad you beat me to it.  I'll leave you alone."  And she turned to go.

"No," he said, "you don't have to go.  It's okay."

She turned back to him.

"You were here first," she said.

"Well, yes, technically," he said.  "But that doesn't mean I have a better claim."

"You were already all settled in when I showed up, though."

"That's just timing," he said.  "Not superiority.  It doesn't mean you don't have as much right to be here as I do."

“We’re still talking about the bed, right?” said Raven, looking him square in the eyes.

“Yes,” he said softly. “Of course.  The bed.”

They regarded each other for a long moment, during which each of them would have given nearly anything to know what the other was thinking.  Finally Marcus scooted over from the center of the bed to the far side, under the high windows, and patted the other, now-empty pillow.

"Just get in," he said.  "It's a big bed.  This is silly."

"You realize," she said dryly, "that those exact words are how I landed in all this trouble in the first place."

"I do realize that," he agreed.  "Are you going to go back to the bunk rooms or are you going to get in?"

"I don't know," she said.  "It feels a little . . ."

"What?"

"Intimate," she said finally, and he burst out laughing.

"Good God, Raven," he said.  "We're sleeping with the same woman.  We've watched each other with her. I've had my hands _inside_ you, for God's sake.  How could sharing a bed for one night _possibly_ be more intimate than anything else we've already done?"

"I don't know," she said, a little helplessly, "but it is."

He patted the pillow again, not taking his eyes off her, and after a long moment she sighed and relented.  She approached the bed gingerly and sat down on the edge of it to remove her leg brace - and then, after a moment of consideration, to slip off her cotton pants.  Raven slept in nothing but her underwear and camisole, usually, and she thought after having seen each other naked there really was no point in making herself uncomfortable with additional sleepwear for some bogus idea of modesty.  So she unsnapped her leg brace, stripped down to nothing but two thin pieces of black cotton, and climbed into bed next to Marcus.

Instantly, something inside her reoriented and things felt . . . right.  She lay on her side, facing away from him, and he draped an arm around her waist with comfortable familiarity.  She felt herself relax into it.  He tightened his arm around her just a little, pulling them closer together, until the curves of their bodies fit perfectly together, hers nested comfortably inside his.

“You all right?” he murmured into her hair, and she nodded.

“I’m good,” she said. “Thank you.”

“Goodnight, Raven,” he said.

“Goodnight, Marcus," she said back. She closed her eyes, and so did he.

But neither of them slept.

Marcus could smell Raven's hair - a kind of sharp, salty, herbaceous tang, like sweat and rosemary - and the arm he had draped casually across her had settled against her stomach at such an angle that his fingertips lightly brushed a bare patch of skin between the place where the camisole ended and the underwear began.  Raven could feel the warmth of Marcus' body pressed all up and down the entire length of her, and was acutely aware of his fingertips on her skin. 

Time passed.

They closed their eyes.  They tried to sleep.

They didn't.

Raven had no idea how long it had been - ten minutes? twenty? an hour? who knows - before she realized that Marcus, behind her, was wide awake.  She felt his breath begin to catch and grow ragged, not the peaceful in-and-out of a sleeping person, and every once in awhile she could feel just the tiniest, most infinitesimal movement of his fingertips against her stomach.

And then he shifted against her from behind, just a little, and there it was.

Kane had not been hard when he first curled his arm around her in that bed.  But he was hard now. 

_Very._

There were a number of possible things, at this juncture, that Raven could have done.  She could have closed her eyes and politely pretended that she was asleep and had not noticed.  She could reposition herself and roll over, get some distance between them, and try to sleep.  She could get up and leave the room, with or without any kind of explanation.

But she did none of those things. 

Instead - and even Raven did not fully understand in that moment what prompted her to make such a decisive, clear, line-crossing move - she placed her own hand over his where it rested on her stomach, and she pressed her entire body back against Marcus, and very, very slowly she began to move against him.

He tensed up immediately as her hips thrust back against his hardness, and a sharp, wordless exclamation escaped him.  She didn't stop.  She pushed harder, grinding her pelvis against his with deliberate, slow, careful movements.  His breath was harsh, panting.  He pulled her close.  He buried his face in her hair.  He began to move against her, too, and his movements began to accelerate, and she could feel him behind her growing harder and harder against the soft flesh of her hips and thighs. 

Then, abruptly, he pulled away.

Raven turned to him and saw that he had rolled over, was facing the wall, his back to her, and was breathing rapidly. 

"Hey," she said, placing her hand on his shoulder and pulling him onto his back, then propping herself up on her elbow to look at him.

"I'm sorry," he said.  She tilted her head to look at him in confusion.

"Why?" she said.

"Because I - just now - I got - I shouldn't have -"

"I started it, Kane," she pointed out reasonably.

"I know, but -"

She shushed him by laying a finger against his lips.

"Kane," she said, and she reached a hand down between his thighs.  He flinched a little at her touch.  "You weren't like this when I got here.  This isn't because it's Abby's bed.  This isn't for Abby."  It wasn't a question. 

He turned his head away, could not look at her.

"Kane," she said again.  "You want me, don't you?"

"Raven, I would never -"

"Yes," she said.  "The answer is yes."

"What do you mean?"

"The answer to the question you didn't ask me and should have," she said.  "The question of whether _I_ want _you_.  The answer is yes."

He turned back and stared at her.

"You can't," he said.  "You can't possibly."

"What does that mean?"

He leaned himself up on his elbow too, so they were facing each other.  "It's different with Abby," he said.  "Because she's, well, she's Abby, so I understand it.  It makes perfect sense.  You and Abby.  I get it.  But you and me -" He paused, thinking it out, trying to explain.  "Wick," he said.  "He's a handsome guy.  He's young.  Athletic.  And Bellamy Blake, well.  I'm on the wrong side of forty, Raven, I'll never have ab muscles like Bellamy Blake's again."

It did not escape Raven how carefully, how respectfully, he did not mention Finn.

"Why are we talking about Bellamy's abs?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"You're used to a different kind of guy," he said, a little helplessly.  "These young, good-looking, fit guys, with perfect bodies, twenty years younger than me.  I get it with Abby, I mean, that you don't - that she isn't - that the age thing doesn't, you know.  Because, I mean.  _Look_ at her.  She's - Well.  You see what I'm saying.  But me and you -"

"Are you -" She stared at him. "Kane, are you afraid I'm not actually attracted to you?"

"You're half my age," he said.  "You're perfect.  Everything about you is perfect.  I just feel a little . . . self-conscious, around you, I suppose.  It was different when we were drunk, but now there's no moonshine, it's just you and me, in this bed, and you're perfect, and I'm -"

"You're perfect too," she said, and he looked embarrassed.  "You want to know why I was trying not to laugh when I first walked in here?  It's because I saw you lying here in the moonlight with no shirt on and I thought, 'Good God, this man is so stupidly, ridiculously sexy that it's absolutely too absurd to be real."  She leaned in closer to him.  "Marcus," she said.  "I don't care how old you are.  It doesn't matter."

"How can it not matter?" he said.

She didn't answer with words, but took his hand and slipped it down inside her cotton underwear to feel her warm, pulsing wetness.  He looked up at her, startled.

"I wasn't like this when I got here, either," she said.  "This isn't for Abby. This is for you." 

"Raven -"

"I know you're good," she said with a mischievous grin.  "I know your moves.  I've seen you in action.  Abby appears to have no complaints."

He couldn't help smiling at that.

"I could say the same about you."

"So what are we waiting for?" she said.  "She wouldn't have told us both to use her bed while she was gone if she didn't intend for us to do exactly this.  It's so obvious."

"And you - you definitely want to?" he said.  "You're really sure?"

"You want to know if I'm sure?" she said.  "Feel it. Feel how sure I am." His fingers, fluttering just on the outskirts of her warm depths, slipped inside, and she gave a little sigh of pleasure.

"I like that," she murmured, as he traced lazy circles with his fingertip through her wet folds.

"I know you do," he whispered into her ear, shifting his weight so he was suddenly lying on top of her.  "I've been paying attention."  His body was hot and deliciously heavy, pressing her downwards into the softness of the mattress.

"I want you," she said, eyes wide with pleasure and anticipation.  "All of you.  _Please_."

He kissed her then, hard and urgent, and she knew immediately that he was not thinking about Abby. He was right there, with her. And within a few moments, she was not thinking about Abby either.

She had thought he would stroke her a little and then dive right in once she was ready, but no.  He kept his hand there, inside her cotton underwear, and caressed her softly, meticulously, thoroughly, while he pressed hot open-mouthed kisses along her breasts and collarbone. He stayed there forever, just kissing and touching, until every nerve in her body felt electric. His fingertips were gentle and deft and precise, swirling abstract patterns through her soft dark hair and sliding over her wet clit, eliciting moans of pleasure. He did not let her come – he pulled away or changed course when she began to accelerate – and she felt her whole body begin to go limp, boneless, liquid.  She began to feel weak, almost faint, and the world around her slid in and out of focus. 

It was nothing at all like being with Finn. Or Bellamy. Or Wick. It was nothing at all like being with a smooth-skinned, lanky boy. Everything about Kane was hard and big and covered with thick dark hair, and as he moved lower and put his mouth to work, as she began to see stars inside her eyelids and feel her breath grow deep and heavy and anguished, she felt herself begin to drift away and a dizzy hallucination overtook her.  It was like one of those Greek myths where the maiden is visited by a god in the form of a beast. Marcus was no longer Marcus, he was a lion on top of her, all fur and growling and fierce heat.  The lion's tongue lapped between her thighs, big and flat and rough, but somehow also deft and precise. She could hear his hot panting breath and reached down to wrap her fists in his soft, thick mane, pressing him down into her as she thrust upwards, almost violently, to capture more.  The lion’s massive paws pressed her hips down against the bed so he could continue to devour her

He lapped at her for a long time, taking care not to let her climax, but keeping her so near it that the whole room felt like it was spinning. Then the lion’s tongue moved away, and she wanted to cry out, if she had been able to form words she would have cried out _, no, come back,_ but she never got the chance because before her conscious mind had even been able to register what was happening, the tongue was replaced by something else altogether and the lion was inside her.

_Oh._

 Oh, _this._

This was what she had wanted.

He was massive, heavy and hard and warm, but she was so wet that he slipped right inside with no resistance. Raven was incoherent, dizzy, her entire body alive with sensation.

"Marcus," she whispered to the lion.  "More.  Please.  _More_." 

He slid gently out of her, then thrust back in again, deeper than before, over and over again, and she arched her back to capture more.  The hidden, deep place that his fingers had reached that night on the roof - that ecstatic spot no one but Marcus had ever reached inside far enough to touch - came to life again as he buried himself deeply inside of her, and she felt herself scratching and clawing at his back, lapping with her tongue at his salty skin like she was an animal too. 

Dimly, as if from a distance, she heard the lion growl her name, again and again, and it made her feel so _alive_ to know that this great powerful beast was so hungry for her.  He felt safe and dangerous at the same time; she knew he was tamed to her, knew he would never hurt her, knew that the vast indestructible strength of the lion's body would shield her from all harm.  Yet she also felt a thrilling vulnerability in the face of his rough, hard forcefulness.  He would not hurt her, no; but he would be just exactly as rough as she wanted, and right now, she wanted him rough.

His thrusts sped up, became more forceful, and her hips nearly rose all the way off the bed, trying to capture more.  She could feel him just circling the edge of losing control, she could hear his low, rumbling roar become harsher, matching her soft cries, and then just as they were both about to soar over the edge together, he pulled out of her.  She opened her mouth to protest, to tell him what she wanted, what she needed, but any words she might have spoken were swallowed up just then because, oh, _oh,_ the lion’s tongue was back, voracious and all-consuming, and she cried out, incoherent words and sounds pouring out of her as she finally crossed over and was pulled down, down, down into the spiraling depths of an orgasm so fierce that she very nearly fainted.

She lay there afterwards, for a long moment, waiting for the world to slowly come back to itself, panting and sweating. She could hear Marcus next to her, breathing hard too, and she sat up suddenly and looked over at him.

"Marcus," she said softly, "why didn't you -"

He looked away.

"It felt too . . ."  He floundered for the right words.  He had not let himself come inside her - he had not, in fact, come at all - and was almost faint with desire himself, nearly incapable of clear articulation.  She could see how hard he still was.  "I didn't know if we were - if it was all right to -"

"I never had my chip out," she said.  "It's safe.  It's fine."

"What?"

"My contraception chip," she said.  "On the Ark.  They have to take it out for you if you want to get pregnant.  Mine's still in.  And, you know.  Not coming out anytime soon.  So if that's what you were worried about -"

"No," he said.  "No, it wasn't that.  It was just -"

"Because it makes it real," she said softly, running her fingers through his hair.  "Because if it's just your mouth, or just your hands, and I'm the only one that comes, you feel like you're still on the right side of some line.  But if you come inside me, it means all of this really happened.  And it happened to you too."  She leaned over to him and kissed her way up his throat to whisper in his ear.  "Why are you afraid, Marcus?" she breathed against his skin. 

"Because then it's not about Abby," he said.

"It stopped being about Abby thirty seconds after I got into this bed."

"I know."

"This is about you and me."

"There wasn't supposed to be a you and me," he said.  "I didn't think - I had no idea, until -"  He stopped.

"When we were on the roof," she said.  "When your hand was inside me.  You knew, didn't you?  You must have known.  How much I wanted it to be real.  How much I wanted you."

He blushed at this, inexplicably, and Raven suddenly understood.

Marcus had seen her desire, had seen in that moment how badly she had wished his hand was something else, but he had thought it was much simpler.  He thought that she wanted the sensation of a man inside her.  He thought it was simply about the satisfaction of a cock instead of hands.

He didn't know.

"It's you," she said.  "It's you I want.  Marcus Kane."

"Raven -"

"I get it now," she said.  "The way Abby feels.  I didn't before.  But she was so right.  It's both completely connected and completely separate at the same time.  It doesn't change anything about the way I feel for her, but now I also want you.  This was what she meant the whole time."  She looked at him.  "It must be the same for you," she said. "It must.  You wouldn't be this shy now if it wasn't."

"Raven, please, I -"

"Come inside me," she whispered in his ear.  "Please.  I want you to.  Cross the line, Marcus.  Make it real.  It's real already, you just have to let yourself admit it."

He hesitated, and she reached down to touch him.  His eyes fluttered closed, and he wasn’t a lion anymore, he was Marcus again, he was just a man, breathing raggedly and uttering soft exclamations as her hands closed around his shaft with practiced skill.  She stroked harder and harder, hands everywhere, and felt the fierce satisfaction of watching his face contort in pleasure. He liked it when she raked her fingernails, ever so gently, along his shaft, and even more when she gently flicked her thumb across the desperately sensitive tip. He inhaled deeply, and it made her feel so powerful, knowing that her touch gave him such pleasure.

Then she pulled her hand away, climbed on top of him, and slid down until he was inside of her.

The angle was tricky, with only one good leg to prop her up, but she leaned forward and braced herself with her hands on his shoulders, loose dark hair falling in a satiny curtain over her face and brushing against his skin.  He gasped as she moved against him, and it made her heart flip over a little.  She felt such a warm wave of affection for him; she wanted to make him feel as good as he had made her. She wanted to do it right. She wanted to send him over the edge too.

Impulsively, as she rocked her hips back and forth and up and down while he surged inside her, she leaned down and kissed him.  His mouth opened beneath hers, hot and hungry, and she savored the taste of him – smoky and woodsy and male – as she nibbled lightly at his bottom lip.

“I like the way you taste,” she whispered into his ear, pressing kisses against the side of his throat, and a low groan escaped him.

"Raven -"

"Come inside me, Marcus," she said again, speeding up her movements, and she felt his whole body quicken, pulsate, and then his thrusting became fiercer and harder and more focused and she looked down at him, her hands clutching at his shoulders, and she watched in astonished delight as his eyes widened, and a desperate strangled cry escaped his lips, and then he burst inside her, anguished, ferocious, with the force of his whole body, and as Raven sank back down on top of him and he seized her in strong arms and kissed her over and over, gratefully, deliriously, fervently, her only regret was that Abby had not been there to watch the whole thing.


	7. Raven and Marcus

 

It took four days after Abby left Kane and Raven alone before they finally slept together, and another seven before they finally called it what it was.

This was how it happened.

**FIRST DAY**

When Raven woke up the next morning in Abby’s bed, Marcus Kane’s arms wrapped around her and his big warm body pressed against her back, it took her a moment to reorient herself and realize where she was. And to remember how she’d gotten there.

She couldn’t repress a smile at the thought of the events of the night before, and shifted a little in Kane’s arms to get more comfortable as the early sunlight streamed in through Abby’s high window. Kane felt her stirring and drifted out of his morning half-sleep to press a kiss into her hair.

“So, _that_ happened,” he offered, in a carefully neutral voice, as though waiting for her to respond before venturing an opinion, and Raven laughed, turning over in bed so she could look at him.

“Sure did,” she agreed.

“In a million years I would never have thought –“

“I know,” she laughed. “Me either.” She took his hand from where it rested on the heavy blanket and examined it in the morning light – the sun-darkened skin, the rifle calluses, the place at the back of his wrist where the dark soft hair of his arms began – and ran her fingertips lightly over it. “I keep saying it over and over in my head and it doesn’t feel real yet,” she said. “’I slept with Kane.’ ‘I’m sleeping with Kane.’ ‘Kane and I are having an affair.’ ‘I had sex with Kane.’ ‘Kane is my lover.’ It doesn’t sound real.”

“Okay, well, first of all, for the love of God stop saying it,” he retorted, “second of all, don’t say ‘affair,’ neither of us are married and that makes it sound sordid, and third of all, are you _ever_ going to start calling me Marcus?”

“I don’t know. It feels wrong.”

“How can it be wrong? It’s my name.”

“Marcus,” she said, slowly, dubiously, as though trying it out. “’I slept with Marcus last night.’ ‘Fuck me harder, _Marcus_.’” She shook her head. “I don’t know,” she said, “I’m not feeling it.” Then she noticed how furiously he was blushing. “Look at you,” she said in delight. “Look how embarrassed you are.”

“Shut up,” he muttered, a little defensively.

“So – just to clarify, here – you can _do_ it, you just can’t _talk_ about it.”

“I can talk about it,” he said, “just not –“

“Just not without using delicate, polite language,” she said. “Fine. What do _you_ think we did last night?”

“We slept together.”

“No,” she shook her head, “we didn’t. We hardly slept at all.”

“Raven –“

“The word I used is the right word for it,” she said, smiling mischievously and leaning in close to him so their mouths were almost touching, so the curtain of her dark hair brushed his skin. “That’s what you call it. When you do things with your tongue that make me have to stick my face in the pillow to keep from screaming and waking up the whole camp? When you come inside me so hard that your fingers leave marks on my skin? It’s okay to call that ‘fucking,’ Kane, that’s what it is.” She brushed her lips ever so lightly against his neck and leaned in close to murmur into his ear. “And you’re really, really good at it.”

He was completely unable to look at her, staring furiously at the wall, his whole body tense with embarrassment and awkwardness, and Raven realized with fond amusement that she was seeing a Marcus Kane almost nobody else ever saw. Outside this room, there was a uniform and an arsenal of guns and an air of authority – even a Chancellor’s pin, once. There had been a wall of steel around the Marcus Kane he used to be, the Marcus Kane he’d been on the Ark. The ground had made him less rigid, less sure of himself perhaps, but no less iron-willed and strong. And yet, underneath all of that, Raven was delighted beyond all reason to discover this hidden fact:

Marcus Kane was _shy._

It hadn’t been for her own benefit, or Abby’s, she suddenly realized, that they had arrived on the roof armed with quarts of moonshine. She and Abby had known what they wanted. It had been for _Kane._ Kane was the uncertain one, the one who couldn’t let himself go. The one who needed to be pushed.

Well. If there was one thing Raven Reyes was good at, it was pushing people around.

“Come back,” she said, pressing her palm against his cheek and turning him back to face her. He started to say something, then, his mouth opened to fumble for words, but Raven suddenly found she had lost all interest in talking. His dark hair was rumpled on the white pillow and his eyes were heavy with sleep and shyness and maybe a more disciplined person than Raven Reyes could have stopped herself from kissing him and pulling his heavy warm body on top of hers, but she certainly couldn’t.

The kiss deepened, and after a long moment, as their mouths moved fierce and warm against each other, she felt him smile, felt the urgent tug of desire for him swell deep and low in the pit of her stomach and felt him rouse to her the same way. And then, all of a sudden, as if by magic, it was a very different Marcus Kane lying there above her, pressing her down into Abby’s soft mattress. The awkward, uncomfortable man, unsure how to make morning-after conversation, unsure how to talk about what happened last night, vanished entirely, and once again he was the Marcus he’d been on the roof. The Marcus who could be forceful and tender by turns, who watched and listened with extraordinary care to learn what Raven wanted, the Marcus whose body was staggeringly responsive to hers. The Marcus who seemed to want her very, very much.

He slipped a hand between her thighs, eliciting a startled gasp, and he laughed – a relaxed, easy laugh, pure pleasure, all awkwardness gone, and she couldn’t help grinning back at him.

“I like you like this,” she said. He parted the soft wet folds and slipped a finger inside, and she clenched her fists against the sheets to hold back another soft cry.

“I’ll bet you do,” he growled into the caramel skin of her shoulder as a second finger joined the first, and she came so fast she hardly knew what had hit her, it took hardly even a minute, she had been so ready for him that it took no time at all. She laughed as she slowly returned to herself, kissing him softly and running a hand through his hair.

“No,” she said, “I didn’t mean just because of _that._ Though I did like that,” she added playfully. “But I mean I like you . . . comfortable.”

“Comfortable?”

“Yeah,” she said. “Not afraid of me.”

This surprised him a little, she could see, and he pulled back just a bit to look straight at her.

“You think I’m afraid of you?” he asked, and it wasn’t accusatory, just puzzled, and a little thoughtful, as though he had never considered it before but now he was wondering too.

“You were,” she insisted. “That first night.”

“Oh, your dry run?” He chuckled. “I wasn’t _afraid_ of you, Raven, I just thought you were crazy. That’s different.”

“No,” she insisted. “You can say it. You should say it. You were afraid.”

He looked down at her, the shyness maybe beginning to return, but he stayed with her, he didn’t turn away. “I wasn’t –“ He stopped. “I suppose I didn’t know how to be around you,” he admitted. “Knowing what had happened between you and Abby. Knowing that none of us were entirely sure where we stood. Wondering whether you’d think I was the enemy. Wondering if you’d ever learn to trust me. And then that night –“ He shook his head. “In all my life I’ve never been more astonished by anything,” he said, “than I was that night when you walked through my door.”

“Kane, you can say it,” she insisted. “You were scared.”

He looked at her for a long moment and then finally, slowly, he nodded.

“It’s okay,” she said reassuringly, running a hand through his hair. “I was too.”

He raised a skeptical eyebrow. “You didn’t look it,” he said doubtfully. "You looked like you walked in there prepared to call all the shots.”

“I was terrified,” she said, and there must have been something more in her eyes than she’d meant to show him because his expression suddenly changed, became strangely sad.

“You don’t mean you were afraid of what would happen,” he said. “Afraid of losing Abby, or of being alone or getting hurt, or afraid of things between us getting messy. That’s not what you meant.”

“Kane –“

“You were afraid of _me_ ,” he said flatly, and the stark unsparing honesty in his voice pierced her so deeply that she realized there was no possible way to deny it. So she didn’t.

“A little,” she said, wanting to explain. “We hardly knew each other before this. We had almost no reason to trust each other. And you used to be a scary guy, Kane. On the Ark, you were somebody dangerous. I’d rather have turned down a wrong hallway than risked running into you when I saw you coming. Everyone did.” He pulled away from her touch then, turning from her, staring blankly at the wall. “Hey,” she said. “Come back. Hey. Kane, it’s okay. You didn’t let me finish. Come back, Kane.” She pulled him back towards her. “You’re not that man anymore. I know you’re not. I’m not judging you,” she said, laying the palm of her hand against his bare chest, over his heart. “I used to be different too. We _all_ used to be different. But you turned out good, Kane. You’re one of the good guys now.”

“Abby says there are no good guys,” he murmured, still not quite able to look at her.

“Abby may be right,” Raven conceded, “but if there are, you’re one of them.” He looked up at her then with something she thought might have been hope, and her heart began to stir in her chest. She kissed him again. “I like you like this,” she said again, softly. “This is the Marcus Kane I like.”

His mouth opened below hers, his hands went to her hair, and he dissolved into her kiss, warm and open and strangely vulnerable.

“This is the Marcus Kane I like too,” he said.

 

**SECOND DAY**

“Can I say something that’s going to sound like an insult but it’s actually a compliment?” said Raven, eyes closed in lazy pleasure as Kane, whose mouth on her breasts had woken her up just a few minutes ago, stroked her idly between the thighs.

“You’re asking permission for that now?” He gave a low chuckle. “Will wonders never cease.”

She ignored him. “I’m glad you’re so much older,” she said.

He pulled his hand away and she opened her eyes to find him glowering at her playfully.

“’So much older,’” he repeated, raising an eyebrow at her. “You want to choose your words a little more carefully there?”

“I just mean – “

“So, so, _so_ much older,” he mocked her. “ _Centuries_ older. The oldest person in the world.”

“Kane –“

“How old do you think I actually am, Raven?”

“I told you it wasn’t an insult,” she protested, unable to keep from laughing at the indignation on his face.

“You did,” he agreed. “I’m waiting to hear how, exactly.”

“Because you know things,” she said. “Things that younger guys don’t know.” This seemed to mollify him somewhat, and he stopped making faces at her to listen. “You’re more experienced,” she went on, as he resumed gently stroking her. “I don’t . . . I haven’t had that many . . . Well. You know. And the others, they’ve never – they didn’t –“

“I’m beginning to see where the compliment part comes in,” he said, “but keep going anyway.”

“There’s this spot,” she began, and then stopped. “The other guys, they haven’t – no one’s ever – do you know that spot? Do you know what I’m talking about?”

A slow smile of pure delight spread over Kane’s face and his fingers shifted between her thighs, slipping deep inside. She was still so wet from the night before that he entered her easily, crooking his fingers inside her just so, and then –

_Oh._

There it was.

Her whole body jolted and she pressed her mouth tightly closed to keep from crying out.

“Yes,” he murmured, pulsing his fingers inside her. “I know that spot.” He pressed a row of hot little kisses up her neck and around her ear. “No one’s ever touched you here before?”

She shook her head, squeezing her eyes closed, breath coming fast and heavy as his hand worked inside her.

“Never,” she whispered. “Never. I had no idea – _oh,_ Kane, oh my God – I had no idea –“ But whatever she was about to say was lost as her body began to tremble and shake beneath him. He felt her tighten around his hand as she began to come and he quickly pressed his mouth against hers to capture her soft cries of orgasm before they were heard. She came fast and hard, lips moving against his in some hybrid of a desperate kiss and a wordless cry. He stayed inside her, stroking and caressing more and more gently, until he had guided her all the way back down to earth and she had gone soft and sweaty and boneless in his arms.

“No one’s ever made me come like that before,” she said once she was lucid again, kissing his bare shoulder over and over. “Never. And yet you do it every single time.” And then she found herself surprised into a laugh at the self-satisfied look on his face. “There,” she said. “I told you it was a compliment. Now, does that make you feel better about your insecurity complex about Bellamy’s abs?”

“You know,” he said in a pleased voice, “it really does.”

**THIRD DAY**

“When did you know?” he asked her suddenly, interrupting her thoughts after they’d walked nearly twenty minutes in companionable silence. Kane was checking on the progress of the supply road to Mount Weather and had brought Raven along – ostensibly to let her get out of camp and stretch her legs, and to begin mapping out where they might be able to lay electrical cable if they could splice into the power supply from the dam.

Or, possibly, to have a conversation with her that he had decided might be easier to have with clothes on.

“When did I know what?” she asked, a little absently. He had startled her out of a pleasing reverie about the internal workings of the central electrical relay and dragged her back to reality almost against her will. She was only half listening at first until she happened to glance over and see that his eyes were dark and serious.

So she stopped walking, looked around to determine whether any of the rest of the convoy were in earshot (they weren’t; only Kane had hung back to walk alongside Raven, whose leg still slowed her down), and turned to him with her arms folded.  “When did I know what?” she repeated.

“You and Abby,” he said. “When did you know?”

“When we were in Mount Weather,” she said, raising a curious eyebrow. “Why?”

He shook his head. “I know it was in Mount Weather,” he said. “I mean what happened. How did you know? When did you know?”

“Kane –“ she began, considering “none of your goddamn business” as a potential answer, but something in his eyes stopped her. Something in the way he looked at her like this was, somehow, an answer he badly needed. Like it was the key to something.

So she turned up the road and kept walking, reasoning that the conversation might go a little easier if she didn’t have to look at him when she said it.

“Nothing happened until the second night,” she said. “Well. The third night, really. The second night we just – we held each other. We slept. That was all. But it felt . . . there was already something –“ She stopped, thinking it through. “No,” she said, realizing as she spoke the words that they were true. “It was before that. I didn’t know until we, until she – until it happened – I didn’t know that’s what the thing was. But I knew there was a thing.”

“Before she even touched you.”

“Before she even touched me,” said Raven. “I think I knew from the moment she found me panicking at the door, when I thought we were trapped, and she took the wrench out of my hands and I felt _safe_ , suddenly, for the first time in I don’t know how long, I felt _safe_. I knew that no matter what happened, if she was there with me I’d be all right. And so then, that night, when we were in bed together and then suddenly we were, you know, _in bed together,_ it wasn’t just that it felt really good. Although I mean of course it felt really good. It felt _right_. You know what I mean? It felt like something had clicked into place. And then I was like, ‘Oh. That’s what it was. It was that the whole time. I just didn’t know.’ Does that make any sense?”

He nodded, as though she had confirmed something he already knew. She watched him for a moment, looking straight ahead over the supply road up to the mountain that his team had spent two weeks clearing, the stone tunnels of Mount Weather visible far up ahead, two days’ walk from where they stood.

“Was it like that for you?” she asked him. “With Abby?”

He nodded without looking at her. “I knew on the Ark,” he said. “I knew long before she did. She had farther to go, with me. I had done far worse things than she had. I had far worse sins to forgive before she could bear to see me as someone she might, maybe, feel something for.” They walked on in silence for awhile longer, looking at the dark shapes down the road which were the backs of Miller and Sinclair and Bellamy, both of them lost in their own thoughts about Abby.

“You haven’t asked me why I wanted to know,” he said, after a few minutes’ silence. They had reached the end of the flat, cleared roadway and entered the forest surrounding Mount Weather, where the convoy road was just a rough path. They could hear the others up ahead, carts rumbling over rocky terrain, but beneath the trees it was quiet and cool and suddenly they felt very secluded, very much alone, and Raven felt her heart begin to thrum inside her chest again, the way it always seemed to do these days when she found herself alone with Kane.

“No,” she agreed simply. “I didn’t ask.”

“Ask me,” he said, stopping suddenly in the middle of the path, and Raven halted abruptly beside him. “Ask me.”

His eyes were dark and deep and full of need and Raven knew, absolutely knew down to the marrow of her bones, that in a few short moments Kane was going to push her up against that big tree and then it would be a swift flash of zippers and hot thrusts and stifled gasps and he would make her bite down on his hand as she came so Miller and Bellamy and Sinclair wouldn’t hear her screaming. Neither of them could wait until they made camp tonight at the base of the mountain. Neither of them were willing to risk being seen entering the other’s tent. But Kane’s eyes said he couldn’t wait any longer, and Raven realized she felt the same way.

“Ask me,” he said again, sweeping her up in his arms and pressing her back firmly against the smoothest part of the tree’s bark, his hand sliding down to unfasten her jeans.

“Why did you want to know about me and Abby?” she whispered, her voice coming in fits and starts as he stroked her already-wet center to make sure she was ready for him. “Why did you want to know?”

“Because,” he murmured as he entered her, causing her to gasp sharply with pleasure and clutch tightly to his arms for balance, “I wanted to know if it was the same with her as it was with us.”

“With us?” she repeated blankly, only half able to think about what he was saying as he drove deeper and deeper into her, touching the place she liked almost instantly and causing her to stumble forward against him, almost losing her balance. He held her up effortlessly, as though she weighed nothing, taking all the weight off her bad leg, bracing her against the back of the tree.

“The way it was for you and Abby. It was the same for me, with you,” he murmured into her hair, one hand sliding up from her waist to palm her soft breast. “I didn’t know what I knew until was too late.”

“Kane –“ she began, but she couldn’t finish, they were both so close, the conversation could wait, right now she just wanted to watch the earnest expression of fierce concentration on his face as he came inside her.

They stood there, bodies locked together, savoring the feel of each other’s skin, kissing each other languidly and slowly, for a dangerously long time. They were outside, they were only a few minutes behind the rest of the group, they could have been spotted a dozen times over. And yet it felt so good to run his tongue along Raven’s amber skin that Kane could not bring himself to stop until, off in the distance, they heard Bellamy’s voice calling their names.

Raven, with enormous presence of mind, straightened up her clothes, gestured at Kane to pull himself back together, and then lowered herself to the ground. By the time Bellamy arrived, to find Raven struggling to push herself up from the ground and brush the dirt from her clothes, he instructed an all-too-willing Kane to “stick close to Raven in case she falls again. I don’t want anything to happen to her.”

“I’ll stay close,” said Kane. “I promise.”

But Bellamy walked with them the rest of the journey, and all the journey back, which meant there was no way for her to ask Kane what he had meant.

_“It was the same for me, with you.”_

_“I didn’t know what I knew until it was too late.”_

 

**SEVENTH DAY**

They arrived back at Camp Jaha shortly before nightfall the following day – prevented, by Bellamy’s concern for Raven’s leg, from falling far enough behind the others to ever get another minute alone – and fell immediately into bed. Marcus did not allude again to whatever it was he’d been trying to say to her in the woods, and Raven didn’t ask.

Three more days passed like that. Work kept them both busy - Marcus supervising the road crew, Raven poring over her electrical grid schematics – but threw them together just enough to keep both of them a little on edge. Sinclair would bring Kane into the workshop with a question about the power splice and ask Raven what she thought, and it would take them both a long moment to answer properly. All Kane could think when he looked at her there, buried in blueprints and grimy with dust, was how badly he wanted to rip the thin cotton shirt off her and take her breasts in his mouth. All Raven could think, as Kane stood there next to Sinclair with his Serious Chancellor Face on, was how he had murmured her name over and over again into the hollow of her neck as he came inside her.

Sinclair, while oblivious to the real situation, was just perceptive enough to be annoyed that neither of them could focus for longer than ten seconds at a time, and eventually left to go meet Bellamy to inventory the crates of surplus electrical cable they had hauled down from Mount Weather, leaving Marcus and Raven blissfully alone for all of nine minutes – which, up against the wall, was plenty of time.

Raven was beginning to wonder if she would ever tire of sex with Marcus. Every time it got better and better. His shyness began to fade, so that the bold and thrillingly-decisive-at-just-the-right-moments Kane he was when he was inside her began to last longer and longer. It wasn’t just about the way he touched her anymore, the way he kissed her, the way he made her come. It was himself, too. He was also thoughtful, and kind, and surprisingly funny, and the intensely focused attentiveness that made him such a considerate lover – the way he had figured out for himself without ever having to be told how best to maneuver her bad leg, for example – meant that he saw Raven in a way that nobody but Abby had in a long, long time.

And so, on the morning of the seventh day after their first night together – two days before Abby would finally, finally come back to them – Kane said the thing he had almost-but-not-quite said in the woods and cracked everything wide open, and Raven began to wonder if it was more than just her body that needed him so badly.

“When did you know?” he asked her suddenly, as he stretched back out onto the pillow and ran a hand through his disheveled, now sweat-dampened hair. It was just past dawn, and they had both woken with the sun but had nowhere to be for two more hours, so they had indulged themselves again in the sunlight. Kane liked it in the morning. He liked being able to look at her.

“When did I know what?” she asked curiously. “About Abby? I already told you.”

He shook his head, the shyness creeping unexpectedly back in again. “No,” he said finally. “About you and me. When did you first know that you . . . that there was –“ He wasn’t sure how to go on and stopped again, a little awkwardly. She rolled over onto her side, facing him, and propped herself up on her elbow to look him in the eye. He didn’t, at first, quite want to meet her gaze, but she placed a firm, gentle hand on his cheek and guided him back to her.

“I’m glad you’re finally asking me the thing you tried to ask me three days ago,” she said, “but it defeats the point if you’re staring at the wall while you talk to me.” He smiled a little at this, conceding.

“When did you know?” he asked again, more seriously this time, looking right at her, and she settled her body more comfortably against him, resting her chin on his chest and regarding him thoughtfully.

“I don’t think I was certain until the roof,” she said finally. “I was pretty damn certain after that. Same for you?” But he surprised her by shaking her head.

“No,” he said unexpectedly, “it was well before that,” and Raven was strangely pleased (and a little surprised) that he had been the one who wanted her first.

“When?” she asked, unable to restrain her curiosity, and he got suddenly a little shy again, but this time managed not to turn away from her, just lowered his eyes a little, not quite able to meet hers.

“When you first came home from Mount Weather a month ago,” he began, as though telling a story, as though he weren’t quite answering the question she’d asked but was telling her something else important she needed to know, “you were as tense as a bowstring. You were afraid of everything. You were afraid of Abby, of yourself. Afraid of me, even, like you said.”

“Kane, I didn’t –“

“Let me finish,” he said gently. “Let me just say it.” She nodded wordlessly, and he went on. “You had shut everything down inside you,” he said, “and then Abby stirred it all back up again. I know. I know exactly what that feels like. It was the same with me. There was never anyone else before Abby, not like this, not with my whole heart like this. I was afraid too. I looked at you and I saw someone I recognized. Someone who had opened the door just the tiniest bit, begun to trust someone, and was afraid it was all going to fall apart.” Raven felt her eyes unaccountably begin to sting with tears, and she gritted her teeth to force them back down again. “I told Abby that night you came back,” he said gently, “before I came to find you. She didn’t understand quite why you were so angry. I had to tell her. I had to tell her it was because you were afraid –“ He stopped for a second, as if unsure whether or not to continue, then she watched him nod, almost as though to himself, as though deciding, before he continued. “You were afraid it was going to be just like what happened with Finn,” he said finally, and the whole world stopped.

The word went through Raven like the vibrations of a shocklash.

It was the first time Kane had ever said Finn’s name to her.

It was the first time in months that _anyone_ had said Finn’s name to her.

It was the first time the darkest fear buried deep in the bottom of the chasm inside her heart had been pulled up to the light and acknowledged.

Finn was right there, he was always right there, but he had begun to fade the faintest bit from the first moment Abby’s arm slipped around her waist inside Mount Weather. He had flared up again in earnest, right in front of her, when she had returned to camp with Abby and realized with horror that she had found herself in the middle of whatever was going on between Abby and Kane. But then he had begun to fade again, bit by bit over the past few weeks, had become somebody who belonged in her past. Somebody she missed and grieved for, but with a pain that grew less sharp every day.

“That’s when I knew,” he said softly, answering the question she had forgotten had been asked. “I didn’t know how badly I wanted you until that night on the roof. But that night, in Abby’s room, when you were so hurt and angry and afraid . . . that was the first time I ever really _saw_ you, Raven. Saw who you really were, saw how alike we are. And all I wanted to do was take you in my arms and hold you and keep you safe so no one could ever hurt you again. Just the way I feel with Abby. It was the same. It was always the same.”

She stared at him for a long moment, unable to respond.

“I didn’t know what I knew,” he said to her again, and she suddenly felt the world around her click smoothly into place.

It had seemed so impossible, at the beginning, what Abby wanted. It had seemed like a disaster waiting to happen. The two of them, jostling furiously for a share of Abby's time and attention, trying to make room for themselves, trying to keep from feeling neglected or forgotten . . . it should have ended in disaster.

But it didn’t. Because it wasn’t like that at all.

Abby loved Kane. That, Raven had figured out immediately. And Kane loved her. And if Raven still didn’t quite trust herself to use that word to describe the thing blossoming inside her heart between herself and Abby – if she wasn’t quite ready to call it love, still, it was the kind of thing that she knew with every fiber of her being would become love eventually, with time. Love was the only direction this road went. It was the only place they could possibly have ended up.

But what was this? What was happening here?

_“It was the same. It was always the same.”_

He had just told her that he loved her, and she had no idea what to say.        

And so she said nothing. She simply kissed him, pulled him down on top of her, parted her soft thighs, and guided him in.

He buried his mouth in her throat – in the place she most liked to be kissed – as he entered her, and let out a heavy groan of pleasure. She felt him surge forward, towards that place only he had ever reached far enough inside of her to touch, and her whole body came alive with pleasure. He lifted his head from her throat and looked down at her as he thrust, just looked at her, deep into her eyes, and there was such a protective affection interwoven with the hungry desire that Raven didn’t know what to do with it except wrap her good leg and her strong arms around his back as tightly as he could and hold him close as she dove off the cliff into another dizzying orgasm and felt him follow close behind. She held him as he shuddered and trembled and came inside her, and she thought about that look in his eyes, and she wondered if he had seen the same thing when he looked at her. She wondered if the dark waters they had held hands and dived into went even deeper than either of them had ever suspected.

This was not in the plan.

Feelings were not in the plan.

She could barely handle her Abby feelings, and she’d had a month and a half since Mount Weather to stumble through the process of beginning to understand those. She’d had only a few days with Kane. And yet, there he was, lying in Abby’s white sheets with the sun pouring down on his rumpled dark hair, and she realized that there was now no longer any conceivable way for her to be happy without either of them. She had fought, hard, not to let Abby in. Abby had very nearly had to break down the door. And yet somehow Kane had simply slipped inside while her back was turned, and now here he was too, inside the place Raven didn’t let anybody see. It had just been her, alone in the dark, since Finn, and now there were three people inside that tiny dark little empty space where her heart used to be, and you’d think it would be cramped in there, you’d think it would be claustrophobic and suffocating, but somehow the walls had expanded. Somehow Abby and Kane had unlocked the door and let themselves in and made themselves at home and turned on all the lights and opened the windows to let in the fresh air, and Raven realized she hadn’t been living inside a small dark cave with no room to breathe; she had merely been curled up in the corner of what had been a bigger, brighter place all along.

Kane made her laugh, and he made her come, but he also made her happy.

_Raven Reyes was happy._

This was going to take some getting used to.


	8. Marcus and Abby and Raven

Two nights later, Abby came home.

The diplomatic convoy had been largely successful, and Abby had sent David Miller back a day ahead of the rest of them to deliver a report to Kane and the rest of the Council. Miller had told Kane to expect the rest of the convoy sometime between midnight and dawn; they had decided they’d rather walk all night to make it back to their own beds rather than camp out in the woods for an extra night.

“They’ll all go straight to their quarters,” Miller pointed out, “so we can convene the Council tomorrow afternoon. No need to wait up, you can see the Chancellor in the morning.”

"Sure," said Marcus, a little awkwardly.  "In the morning.  Right." 

He was getting better at the sneaking around part, he really was; but Raven was not ten feet away repairing a broken wall panel and her screw gun was loud but not _that_ loud and Marcus could practically _hear_ her smirking.  _Goddammit, Raven._ (Though on the plus side, at least the secret wasn’t out.)

In the end, they did decide to wait up for Abby . . . in their own way.   And so when Octavia, Lincoln, Bellamy and Abby returned to Camp Jaha around two o’clock in the morning, and Abby silently let herself into her quarters and closed the door noiselessly behind her, she saw exactly what she had hoped to see – two shapes under white sheets, faintly lit by a single shaft of moonlight through the high window, rising and falling and filling the room with soft, whispery sounds.

The fact that she had known all along she would get her own way didn't make it any less satisfactory to return home and realize that everything had gone perfectly according to plan.  She watched for a few moments, making out their silhouettes beneath the sheets. Raven was on top, her hands braced against Marcus’ chest, her dark hair falling in a loose curtain over both their faces, entirely obscuring Abby from their view – not that they were paying attention to anything else anyway. Abby set her bags down on the floor behind her without a sound and latched the door. She froze for a second as the rusted bolt made a soft, telltale _click_ , but the two shapes in the bed on the other side of the room missed it entirely.

Abby felt her whole body go warm and soft all over as she watched Raven lean down and rest her forehead against Kane’s. They didn’t kiss; they simply looked at each other. Ragged, desperate gasps escaped both their parted mouths, and Abby could tell they were both close. In the dark shadows on the other side of the room, she undressed silently, and she had pulled back the sheet and slipped her cold body into the bed beside them before either of them even noticed she was there.

“Abby,” murmured Raven in a rough, throaty voice, eyes wide with surprise, but the single word was swallowed up as Abby seized Raven’s mouth in a hungry, melting kiss, then bent down to take Marcus’ mouth in her own as well.

“I’m so glad you’ve both made yourself at home,” she murmured, laughing, as she pressed her body up against both of theirs. “Don’t stop on my account.”

“Abby –“ Raven began to say, but stopped, not quite sure how to go on. Abby shook her head. “Don’t stop,” she whispered to Raven, running a gentle hand through the girl's loose dark hair. “Please. Please. Don’t stop.” But Raven hesitated, just a little, and both Kane and Abby could feel her discomfort rising back up again. Kane was still inside her, and her entire body wanted to keep going, but it was suddenly different now that Abby was there. Now it was new all over again. Now they were back on unfamiliar ground.

But Abby, as always, knew exactly what to do. She rose up to her hands and knees and crawled over Marcus’ body until she was straddling him. Then she reached down and slipped one arm around Raven’s waist and one over her breasts and pulled her back up towards her, adjusting both her legs as she went, bringing Raven into a kneeling position astride Marcus’ body. She did it carefully, keeping Raven positioned over Marcus’ cock, and held her there with strong, gentle arms. Raven could feel Abby’s breasts pressed up hard against her back, could feel Abby’s breath warm on the back of her neck, could feel one hand pressed low and flat against her belly and the other idly caressing Raven’s nipples. And then it happened.

Abby began to move.

Raven gasped as Abby, arms still wrapped tightly around her, shifted ever so slightly and leaned them both forward. The change in angle sent Kane suddenly deeper inside her, and Raven bit her lip to keep from crying out. This had always been how she liked it best, but her bad leg made it difficult to hold herself up above Kane’s body at the angle she wanted to reach. But Abby, strong and sure, held Raven steady as they leaned forward, as they rode Kane together. Kane’s hips rose and fell from the bed, faster and faster, eyes closed, hands grasping helplessly at the sheets, as Raven rocked back and forth above him. Abby buried her mouth in the hollow of Raven’s throat and slipped her hand even lower to graze gentle fingers against Raven’s clit, and that did it. Raven couldn’t hold out any longer. She bit her lip to swallow down her frantic cry, and with a great silent shudder she collapsed and went liquid in Abby’s arms. Kane followed her a heartbeat later, and Abby felt her heart swell with impossible affection as she lowered Raven gently back down to the bed beside him.

Orgasms always made Raven sleepy, and in her defense, this time she did try valiantly to fight it – she hadn’t seen Abby in so long, there was so much to say – but “Shhh, baby girl,” Abby murmured, running a gentle hand through Raven’s tangled hair as Kane’s warm hand stroked her back, and after that it was powerless to resist. Raven drifted off into a blissful, heavy sleep, soothed into perfect contentment by the tender caresses of both their hands.

When she slowly faded back into consciousness sometime later, she had no idea what time it was or how long she’d been out. She heard Abby and Kane beside her, murmuring to each other in quiet voices, and she considered rolling over and greeting them before she heard her own name, and realized suddenly that they were talking about her.

"I liked that," said Abby softly.  "Watching you with her."

"I know you did," Kane responded dryly, and Raven could hear the smile in his voice.

She froze completely still, her back to them, and kept her breathing as even and regular as she could. They hadn’t noticed her waking up, it seemed, had just continued talking, so she held very still to listen.

Eavesdropping wasn't very polite - but after all, it was different when someone was talking about you.  And Raven was very, very curious what Kane was going to say.

“How many days did it take?” Abby asked, and Raven heard Kane give a low chuckle.

“You could try to be a little less pleased with yourself,” he pointed out. “I know how much you love being right, but at this point you’re just rubbing it in.”

“You’re never going to doubt me again, are you?” she purred contentedly, and he gave a derisive snort.

“I’m not sure I’m willing to go that far,” he began, then broke off with a soft gasp. Abby laughed quietly, and from the sounds behind her Raven deduced that Abby had shut him up by the simple expedient of taking his cock in her hand.

“Fine,” he admitted grudgingly, through harsh intakes of breath. “I’ll never doubt you again.”

“Good,” said Abby triumphantly, and Raven felt movement at her back as Abby slid on top of Marcus’ body and kissed him. Raven’s back had been pressed up against his side, so now she could feel Abby’s soft warm skin against her own too. She felt heat begin to swirl between her thighs. _Stop it,_ she commanded herself firmly. She didn’t want them to stop talking, she wanted to hear what they were going to say next, but she could not move a muscle without disturbing them - which meant she had no way to touch herself without interrupting their conversation. She gritted her teeth and tried to swallow down the waves of mounting arousal.

“What is it like?” Abby whispered breathlessly, and Raven was startled at the raw, naked excitement in her voice. “Tell me what it feels like. With Raven. Tell me everything.”

"You know what it's like," he said.  "You've been with her longer than I have."

"I want to hear you say it.  Tell me."

“She’s . . . “ Marcus thought for a moment, then stopped. Raven couldn’t, of course, see his face, but she knew what she’d see if she turned around. He would be furrowing his brow thoughtfully, taking the question seriously. “She’s extraordinary,” he said simply, after a long silence. “She makes everything feel new again. I don’t know how else to explain it. I don’t just mean – when we’re together. When I’m inside her. It’s not just that. It’s more than that.” He fell silent for a moment, and Raven could almost hear him thinking. “I feel _alive_ when I’m with her,” he said finally. “She’s the most alive person I’ve ever met.”

Abby made a contented sound, as though this had been the answer she had been hoping for. “Yes,” she murmured. “That’s it. That’s it exactly. Doesn’t she just make you feel –“

“Twenty years younger,” laughed Kane, and Abby laughed too.

“I told you,” said Abby. “I told you she would change your life.”

“I don’t know how much longer you’re going to keep saying ‘I told you so.’”

“Well, a little while longer, anyway,” Abby retorted, and they both laughed. Raven felt Abby’s body move behind her, and then she felt soft silky hair brush her back. Abby had shifted and was resting her head on Kane’s chest.

“I thought you were crazy,” he said after a moment.

“I know.”

“I thought there was no way either of us – I knew I didn’t have the right – I couldn’t tell you _not_ to, I couldn’t tell you that you weren’t _allowed_ to be with her, if that was what you wanted – but part of me thought, well, this is the end of it, then, she’s made her choice, there can’t possibly be room for both of us.”

“I know.”

“And then when it began to look like maybe there was – that maybe at the very least it wouldn’t be impossible for her and I to, well, to sort of . . . make room for each other – I thought that would be enough. I thought that was as much as anyone could reasonably expect. I thought, okay, we can do this. We can make this work. And then that night, on the roof –“

“I knew right away,” Abby said softly. “I knew the moment I saw you touch her.”

“I didn’t,” he admitted helplessly. “I had no idea. I thought, how could a girl like her and a man like me possibly –“

“I wish you could see yourself the way I saw you,” she murmured, her mouth so close to Raven’s back that she could feel the warmth of Abby’s breath. “I wish you saw what I saw. Raven sees it too.”

“I don’t –“

“She loves you, Marcus,” said Abby quietly, and there was something like wonder in her voice, something that hummed and pulsed like joy bursting to get out.

“She loves you, too,” he said, and there was a smile in his voice that made Raven’s heart stop beating.

Because Raven had never actually said it.

To anyone.

Finn had known - obviously - but it wasn't a thing they _said._ It wasn't a thing that was _conscious._ It was just . . . there.  Always.  Hovering right between them.  And that was restful, you know?  Knowing without having to say it.  And so obviously she'd never planned to say it to - well, she hadn't _planned_ any of this.  But certainly she'd never intended to say it out loud to Abby.  Or to Kane.  She hadn't intended to have to deal with . . . well.  Feelings shit.  She wasn't great at that.  Kind of terrible at it, actually.  She liked the sex part (she knew she was pretty damn good at that part, not to brag) and she liked spending time with both of them, she liked the way they made her feel – safe, and cherished, like the way this whole “family” thing everyone made such a big deal about was maybe supposed to feel.  Like there were people who thought about her when she wasn’t around and worried about whether she was okay and talked quietly in bed to each other about wonderful she was when they thought she was too asleep to hear them.

But that wasn’t _love._

_Was it?_

Was Abby right?

Jesus Christ, how did _love_ suddenly get mixed up in all of this?

How did _they_ know how she felt before _she_ did?

A soft, breathy moan from behind her sent another wave of swirling heat between Raven’s thighs, and she swallowed hard. Abby’s body shifted, and Raven suddenly remembered that Abby – while certainly an active and engaged participant in the action she’d walked in on between Raven and Kane – hadn’t actually had any fun yet herself.

 _Oh God,_ she thought. They were going to do it. Right there in the bed next to her.  And she’d already decided to pretend to be asleep, which meant she had to ride this out. She couldn’t pretend to wake up _now_ , the literal second they’d stopped talking about her.  They’d know she’d been faking.  They'd know she'd heard everything, and then they'd have to _talk_ about it.  No, she couldn't wake up yet.  But she didn’t want to do it while Kane and Abby were in the middle of enjoying themselves, and ruin their mood. It felt important, somehow, to let them have some semblance of privacy.  She'd had Kane to herself for two weeks, now it was Abby's turn.  She needed to give them their space. 

No, she was just going to have to lay here, gritting her teeth, completely unable to touch herself while both of her lovers had insanely hot sex right behind her that she could hear, and feel - but not watch.

_Goddammit, Raven._

As things began to heat up, Raven reflected that they could hardly have done a better, more thorough job of torturing her if they’d done it deliberately. As their bodies began to move against each other, Kane wrapped his arms around Abby and rolled her over so that he was on top of her – and in the process, moving both of them even closer to Raven.

“Careful,” murmured Abby.

Kane reached out a hand and ran it up and down the skin of Raven’s back from her shoulder blades to the curve of her ass. She permitted herself to stir slightly in her sleep, but did not wake – though his touch shot fire between her thighs, where she could feel a hot wetness beginning to gather.

“Let’s wake her up,” he said softly.

 _Yes,_ begged Raven. _Please. Please. Wake me up._

“No,” said Abby affectionately, “let her sleep. She crashed out _hard_. She obviously needed it. I ran into Sinclair on the way in and he said she’s been working around the clock. Let our girl get some rest.” Kane sighed, but pulled his hand reluctantly away and returned his full energy to Abby.

The next half hour was exquisite torture. For Christ’s sake, thought Raven, they haven’t seen each other in two weeks, this should have been quick and dirty and over in five minutes. But no, they took their time, they murmured, they kissed, they moaned softly, and every time their bodies shifted Raven could feel it against her back. Never in her whole life had she wanted more desperately to be able to touch herself. But she’d fallen asleep on her side, with one arm pillowed beneath her head and the other draped across her midsection, and her fingertips just grazed her navel – several infuriating inches too high to do her any good.

 _Fuck my life,_ she thought, as she heard a soft wet sound and a startled gasp and felt their movement accelerate, and she knew Kane had thrust himself into Abby.

“Do you make her come?” Abby whispered through soft whimpering cries, and Raven gritted her teeth. They weren’t just fucking six inches away from her, now they had to be talking dirty about her too?

“Yes,” Kane murmured softly, groaning as he thrust deeper and deeper into Abby. “Every time.”

Abby laughed. “Good boy,” she said affectionately. “Show me how you do it.” He shifted on top of her then, and she inhaled sharply, and Raven knew that he’d found the place Abby liked too.

“Oh,” she breathed. _“Oh.”_

“Is that good?”

“Right there,” she whispered, “right there. That’s where I like it.”

“That’s where Raven likes it too,” he breathed into her shoulder, and Raven could feel Abby begin to spiral out of control towards climax, knowing exactly how the other woman must be feeling. “She said no one had ever touched her there before.”

“Good God,” said Abby, her words choked between panting breaths, “no wonder she’s smitten with you.”

 _I hate you both, I hate everything, this is the literal worst._ _I'm going to die.  I'm so turned on it's going to actually kill me._   _Cause of death: Kane and Abby talking about me while they have sex six inches from my head._

“I missed you,” he said softly. “It feels so good to be inside you.”

“Marcus,” she whispered back. “I’m so close. Please. I’m so close.”

“Abby,” he moaned, his voice muffled by her skin – his hair grazed the back of Raven’s neck and she knew he had buried his mouth in Abby’s throat, she could hear the sound of soft hungry kisses – and Abby moaned his own name back as he thrust into her, and Raven’s clit began to throb with an arousal so urgent and desperate that it was almost painful as she heard first Marcus, and then Abby, cry out softly and shudder and come hard against each other and collapse into a panting heap.

Raven had never in her whole life been this desperately, agonizingly turned on with no hope of relief, and her whole body was drawn so tightly with tension that it took her a moment to realize what was happening when Kane rolled her over onto her back, laughing.

“You stubborn little pain in the ass,” he said.  "You can open your eyes now.  Faker."

“I’m out of ideas,” said Abby frankly. “If we couldn’t break her by having sex literally _right up against her back_ , honest to God, I’ve got nothing else.”

“Did we cover the whole list?”

“The whole list.  Saying her name, check – touch her, check – dirty talk, check –“

“Dirty a-little-more-than-talking,” added Kane wryly.

“ _Also_ check.”

Raven, eyes still closed, felt Kane move and felt his hot, heavy warm body sink down on top of her.

“She's really doubling down on this fake-sleeping thing,” said Kane, his mouth hovering just over her ear, tickling her with warm breath.  "We're going to have to try something else."

Well, _now,_ of course, she _couldn’t_ wake up, because now it was apparently a contest, which meant now it was about _winning._   So even though Kane was running hot firm hands all over her body – even though Abby’s fingers were toying ever so slightly with the soaking wet dark hair between her thighs – even though they knew she was faking it, and she _knew_ they knew, and they knew that she knew that they knew, and thus it made _absolutely no sense_ to keep the charade going – still, Raven was Raven.  She squeezed her eyes stubbornly shut and kept her whole body perfectly still.

Kane sighed.  “All right,” he said teasingly, “I warned you."

“He warned you,” agreed Abby. “Just remember, Raven, that you drove us to this.”  And then all pretense at sleep flew out the window because Abby’s mouth was between her legs, and _holy shit_ she'd missed this.

Raven’s eyes flew open and she let out a startled gasp. Kane pressed his mouth against hers. “Good morning, idiot,” he said affectionately.

“Shut up,” she murmured, gasping to catch her breath as Abby’s soft tongue lapped hungrily at her clit.

“I just lost two bottles of moonshine and my good tent,” he laughed, pressing warm kisses against her neck. “I bet Abby you’d wake up the second one of us touched you.”

“And I,” said Abby, pausing in her ministrations to raise her head and grin at them both, “told him that once you’d made up your mind to do something – even something really stupid – there was no talking you out of it.”

“So you knew the whole time?”

“We’re not stupid,” said Kane, as Abby went back to work.  "You were snoring, and then you stopped.  We knew you were awake."  Raven felt her hips begin to rise of their own volition off the mattress to capture more of Abby’s mouth. Kane bent down to kiss her again, but she stopped him, taking his face in her hands.

“But – but what you said,” she began, helplessly. “What you said. About me –“

Kane pulled back from her just the tiniest bit, so he could see her better, his dark eyes warm and serious, and started to say something.  But Raven had been good to go for _awhile_ now and Abby worked quick, so whatever he was going to say was forced to wait as Abby’s tongue swept Raven into a wild, dizzy orgasm, and for a long moment before she returned to earth she forgot what words were or even what conscious thought was.

Abby crawled back up the bed, on the other side of Raven, and pressed her small body against Raven’s sweaty skin. Kane leaned down to kiss her, and Raven suddenly remembered that she had started to say something, something important.

“Wait,” she said suddenly, and he stopped. “Wait. Listen. I – the things you said – when you thought I was sleeping, the things you said - about me –“ She faltered a little, feeling her heart begin to pound rapidly in her chest – not just from the climax that had left her flushed and weak and sweaty, but from something that went even deeper than that.

She lay her hand on the side of Kane’s cheek, then reached out her other hand to grasp Abby’s in her own.

“You were right,” she said simply. “The thing you said. About me.   About . . . us. You were right.”

Abby sat up.

Kane sat up.

They both looked at her.

“Say it, Raven,” said Abby gently, taking her hand and pulling her up between them. “Say it.”

“I can’t,” she whispered, pressing her eyes closed again, feeling the pounding of her heart like a drum inside her chest. She couldn’t say it. Saying it made it real. She wasn’t ready for this to be real.

_Was she?_

Or wasn’t it, if she was being really honest, so real already that she could feel it all the way down to her bones?

Why was she still closing her eyes?

What was she hiding from?

“Say it,” Abby coaxed her again, and Raven opened her eyes to see both of them, both their stupid beautiful perfect faces right in front of her, looking at her, waiting patiently for her to say the thing they all knew she was going to say.

“Why don’t I go first,” said Kane finally. He leaned in and kissed Raven’s mouth softly. “I love you, Raven,” he said, in a voice of such infinite gentleness that Raven could hardly believe he was the same man she had known on the Ark. Then Abby bent her head and kissed her too, a long sweet slow kiss, full of hope and possibility, like the first time she had kissed Raven in that bed inside Mount Weather after she had rescued Raven from the darkness of her own most terrible fears. “I love you, Raven,” said Abby, tears shining in the corners of her eyes, and suddenly Raven couldn’t remember anymore why she was fighting this.

“I love you too,” she said, looking from Abby to Kane and then back again, and closed her eyes as their arms wrapped around her, warm and strong. They sank back down to the pillows, bodies tangled together, and they fell asleep that way – Raven in the center of the bed, held close by Kane and Abby’s arms.


	9. Raven's New Toy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There's a 5-chapter sequel/spinoff fic to "Triangulation," all about Raven's sexy new mechanical invention that gets used in all sorts of different combinations . . . to make sure everyone who subscribed to this fic can find the link to the next batch of OT3 smut, I'm adding the link here!

> _Raven didn’t notice her, and it was immediately obvious why._
> 
> _She was lying in the makeshift cot strung up in the corner of the workshop, naked except for her faded, threadbare bra, and she was holding something in her hands that Abby couldn’t quite see.  A low mechanical hum filled the room, though it was nearly drowned out by the sound of Raven’s labored breathing.  Her eyes were closed and she was thoroughly distracted, so Abby crept closer, keeping close to the shadows near the walls of the dimly-lit room._
> 
> _Upon closer inspection, it was clear what the thing in her hand was – and what she was doing with it – proving all Abby’s suspicions correct.  She’d clearly been at it for awhile, since Abby could see the leather-covered device glistening with Raven every time she slipped it out and then plunged it in again.  The hum appeared to be coming from the device, and Abby watched hungrily as Raven tapped a button on the end of it and the buzzing sound (and Raven’s frantic thrusting) intensified._
> 
> _Abby hadn’t pulled her underwear on beneath the soft cotton shift and robe she had grabbed from the back of her chair when she left the room, and she could feel heat and wetness beginning to stir deep inside her.  So she knelt down on the cot, knees straddling Raven’s naked hips, and clamped her own hand around the cock._
> 
> _Raven’s eyes flew open, startled and panicky, until she saw who it was._
> 
> _“I knew you were up to something,” Abby grinned, pressing a hot, open-mouthed kiss against Raven’s parted lips and sinking down on top of her.  “And it’s very greedy not to share . . ."  
> _

 

**[Read the rest of the fic here! ](http://archiveofourown.org/works/5672620#main) **

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Raven's New Toy](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5672620) by [ChancellorGriffin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChancellorGriffin/pseuds/ChancellorGriffin)




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